Gifts of the Heart
by Aqua
Summary: Alternate Universe Shuuichi a personal assistant servant is overjoyed when he meets his new master, Crowned Prince Yuki. The only problem is that he's fallen headoverheels, and Yuki doesn't seem to care.
1. Chapter 01

Okay, I don't know why, but goofed up the chapters. This is the real Chapter 1! ;;;

Gifts of the Heart Chapter 1

Yuki sighed and settled himself more deeply into his uncomfortable chair, doing his best to keep his boredom from showing on his face. He knew he wasn't being very successful, by his father's occasional disapproving looks, but he just held no real interest in the present meeting. It was just a visitor, doing his best to blow smoke up the King's ass about how good of an ally his country would make. Yuki had better things to do than listen to someone's barely disguised groveling.

Through the droning monotone he was trying to drown out, Yuki caught the word 'gift', and couldn't help but find his interested peeked. His favorite riding horse was getting on in years, and he was unsatisfied with the quality of the others. He wouldn't mind if he were handed one, say, as a bribe for their allegiance.

However, when he looked up, Yuki was shocked not to see an animal or treasure, but rather a person! Two people, actually, and he frowned deeply when he realized exactly what was being offered. Yes, they had many servants in the castle, but all of them had been hired. He didn't relish the idea of people just being handed off as gifts.

"Our best trained personal servants. A gift for the Crowned Prince and his brother," the man was saying, which was all Yuki caught before he drown the man out once again.

Instead, he let his eyes trail over the young man kneeling before him. He looked quite young still, not even out of his teen years. The childish illusion was helped by round cheeks and large eyes. The eyes surprised Yuki slightly with their brightness. He wouldn't of expected a servant being handed off to look so happy about it. The servant had dark hair that wasn't well kept, the locks falling down over his ears and eyes. Far different from his clothing, which were well-tailored and unwrinkled.

Yuki had always refused his father's insistence on having a personal servant. He did have several which prepared his baths and solitary meals. He'd always just relied on the stable hands to prepare his mounts, the laundry women to clean his clothes, and his own self to get dressed in the mornings. A personal servant would have to share his room in order to do his/her chores properly, and he hadn't wanted to give up that privacy.

However, in this situation, he couldn't refuse the gift without making a scene. The country presenting the gift would find it as a terrible insult, and Yuki knew his father would be furious with him. The two of them already had enough troubles as it was, without piling this on top of it.

Wisely, as his brother did, Yuki kept his mouth shut and simply nodded his head. Seeing their acceptance, his father quickly began thanking the man for his generosity. During times like these, it was best to keep one's mouth shut, and let the king speak. Especially since Yuki's father liked to keep tight control over every situation.

As would be expected of them, the two offered boys shifted so that they were now facing the court, appointed as they now were. Yuki gazed at his newly acquired servant's back, wondering what he was going to do. It was possible, after the visitor left, for him to refuse the gift then. But much of the court had seen the proceedings, and that would raise a lot of questions. Not to mention what they would do with the boy. His father already had his own servant, and it would be a great demotion for the boy to be moved down to any other duty.

For now, he would let things lay as they were, Yuki decided. If the boy was quiet, perhaps it wouldn't be too bad of a thing to have his own servant. It would be nice not to have to find someone available to boil water for him so he could have his baths, and instead just have it ready for him when he woke up.

Yes, maybe it wouldn't be that bad. 


	2. Chapter 02

Chapter 2

Shuuichi stood in the middle of the prince's private common room, uncertain what to do with himself. His heart had only just returned to its regular tempo. After the proceedings, he'd been whisked away so he could familiarize himself with his new master's chambers, while the royalties went on with the day's matters.

He'd been trained since birth to be a personal assistant, having been lucky enough to be the son of one of Empress Morahiko's maiden. He'd found out one year ago that he would be presented to the Crowned Prince Yuki as a gift, the son of the king of a nearby country. He'd had to learn English, as well as the proper way to look after western royalty. There wasn't much of a difference, but he'd been so nervous during the journey here that he'd hardly been able to keep himself from going insane.

He'd known nothing of his new master. A large part of him had been fearing some kind of ogre-human hybrid, a dirty old man that drooled when he talked and missed when he tried to pee in the chamber pot, despite the fact Shuuichi knew he would only a few years older than himself. The truth of the matter was that Prince Yuki seemed to be an extremely private person, and so not many people could tell Shuuichi anything about him.

Ryuuichi had been luckier, in that he knew quite a bit about the man whom he would be serving. Prince Tetsua was known for how social he was, traveling to wherever he was invited for dinners and ceremonies, usually accompanying his father. He was several years younger than his brother, and was known for his good humor and skillful story-telling.

It was because he was younger that he'd been presented to the prince with higher status. And he had to admit that he'd been very pleasantly surprised. Prince Yuki was gorgeous! He had almost stopped breathing, his heart thudding loud in his ears, when his eyes had fallen upon the blonde. His expression had been bored and serious, but his eyes shimmered in the firelight like the ocean. His skin was so pale, silken and blemishless. Each blonde hair, long and shining, was in it's place, crowning his brow almost perfectly.

He could never of imagined someone so beautiful. Tall and perfectly sculpted, with a broad chest and shoulders. A shiver had gone down his spine when it had sunk in that it would be his duty to care for this person. He would be the one to sleep in the cot next to the bed, to bathe and clothe and aid the prince in any way he could.

And, suddenly, it didn't feel like he was the gift. The gift was being able to share this person's life, to be next to him and to get to know him. In the instant his eyes had fallen upon the other, Shuuichi had fallen in love.

There was still some time before he would be retrieved by another servant and shown around the castle, and so Shuuichi began exploring his master's chamber.

The main door lead into a small living area. Full bookshelves stretched along the side walls, the far wall mostly opened by a large window. There were thick curtains to keep the cold out, but for now it was opened to the warm sunlight and spring breeze. There were several chairs and a table, but this particular part of the room was bare of any personal touches. There were no pictures, no personal affects of any kind. Obviously, Prince Yuki wanted to keep the public part of his chambers clear of any of his personal items.

The small door to the left turned out to be a storage closet, containing Yuki's hunting and riding gear among a few other larger collections. Shuuichi frowned a little, wondering again at the personality of the man he would be serving. Most just left these kind of affects in common rooms, where they could be tended to by whichever hand was responsible.

There was a doorway to the right which lead into the bedroom. This room was much larger than the main room, although a good quarter of it was taken up by the prince's bed alone. The blanket was richly decorated, mostly crimson, with gold weaving the pattern of a phoenix across the spance of the top. It matched the only picture in the room, also crimson and gold, of a phoenix flying into the sun.

There was a large chest of drawers, each full of different types of clothing. Shuuichi already knew which were used for what, so he did his best to memorize their correct places for when he would need to retrieve them in the future.

The cot which would serve as his bed was presently bare, folded up against the far wall as though it hadn't been used yet. Shuuichi didn't mind that fact, it meant that the mattress would be unused and easily molded into his personal 'body-groove'. He would much rather crawl into the huge bed with his prince, but the cot would suit. It was much better than most that he'd seen, even the one he'd slept on before.

Shuuichi pulled it out, settling it against the bare wall where he would be out of Prince Yuki's path to the washroom and living room. He made a mental note to grab himself some bedding later before making his way into the washroom.

Thankfully, it would be someone else's duty to change the chamber pot. Still, Shuuichi made a mental note of it's position so that he didn't end up doing something stupid like trip over it. Every morning, another servant would place hot water outside the door. Shuuichi's duty would be to retrieve it and pour it into the wash basin perched atop a wall protrusion. Yuki's grooming necessities were there as well, which Shuuichi would use once his master was finished before cleaning and replacing them.

The washroom itself was the smallest room yet, mostly taken up by the bath tub. Shuuichi frowned at the size of it. Westerners didn't just wash and rinse as Shuuichi was used to. He would actually have to retrieve enough hot water to fill that thing whenever his prince asked it of him. The task seemed a little daunting, and he worried that he wouldn't have the strength to cart that many buckets of water around. Hopefully the kitchens weren't too far.

All in all, though, he wasn't about to complain. The prince's room was not nearly as decorated as those Shuuichi was used to seeing. There would not be much to clean and dust, and everything seemed to have a specific place to be put. Really, the books were the only difficult thing to tend to, but as he'd been taught to read as well as speak English, he found himself glad for their presence. While Prince Yuki was attending to his daily matters in which Shuuichi would not accompany him, it would be nice to be able to read something. He had never actually read a book before.

Unable to help himself, Shuuichi made his way back into the bedroom and threw himself on the huge bed. He couldn't help a little moan as he sank into the mattress, every part of himself feeling as though he were laying on fluff. The western bed was nicer than he'd heard. Really, this was something that Japan had to adopt. It was FAR more comfortable than the floor.

A knock resounded through the rooms and Shuuichi jumped off the bed quickly, knowing perfectly well that he was doing something bad. He'd been told not to touch his masters personal things, unless it was necessary. Probably the man was already having enough trouble with having to share his rooms, never mind finding someone else laying in his bed.

Shuuichi answered the door, finding a young woman he hadn't met before. Which wasn't surprising, considering he'd only met one of the other servants so far. She smiled at him before proceeding to dump a pile of linens into his arms.

"These are yours, for your bed," she stated, her smile staying in place. "I have your personal items as well, so if you want to lead the way, I'll help you carry them in."

"Right, thanks," Shuuichi replied, a little taken back as he made his way back into the bedroom.

"You'll clear out one of the bottom drawers in Prince Yuki's chest for now. There was no foreword about your coming, so no separate chest was made for you. When they have one done, you can move your clothes then. For now, leave this, and I'll show you around the castle. There are only a couple of hours before you'll need to bring Prince Yuki his evening meal, so we don't have a lot of time."

"Thanks," Shuuichi said again, a little uncertain as to how to address this girl. English didn't have the same respectful changes as Japanese did. Was he to address her as miss? She hadn't given her a name....

"You can call me Michelle, by the way. You're Shuuichi, right? It's already all over the castle, and probably most of the town. It's not every day that new people come to work in the castle, never mind being given top serving positions! I have to say, watch out for a girl name Samantha. She's been vying to be Prince Yuki's personal assistant for the last three years, and she's not too happy about you showing up."

Shuuichi frowned, not having expected to make an enemy.

"Ah, I wouldn't worry about it. She tends to the gardens, so she only gets to come inside when it's time to sleep anyway. As long as you stay out of there, the two of you will probably never meet. Everyone else is excited to meet you, you'd better be sure! You'll probably meet so many people today that you're head will spin. But don't worry about trying to memorize everyone's names or anything. It's just the locations you'll need to know. Don't worry about getting that down pat right away either. I'm in charge of this wing of the castle, so I should be nearby if you forget. Not that you'll have any troubles before long, I'm sure. Most of your duties take place right in this room anyway!"

Shuuichi waited a pause for her to start again. "Do you breathe?" he questioned when she didn't, a grin quirking his lips.

She blinked at him for a second, then laughed outright. "Sorry, I'm just so excited. Your and Ryuuichi's arrival is a big deal, you know, and I want to make sure I don't fail in my job of making sure you're prepared to start your duties."

"I'm sure you'll do fine, I just want to make sure I can get a word in, just in case I need to ask a question," he replied.

She laughed again at his teasing, then motioned for him to follow her out of the chambers. He was surprised to see Ryuuichi standing in the hall, obviously having been waiting for them.

"Shuuichi! Isn't this the best?" the older man exclaimed, giving him a fierce hug.

"Well, there's one person I don't have to introduce you to, at least," Michelle commented.

"We grew up together," Shuuichi offered as an explanation, Ryuuichi still hanging off his shoulders. "Our mothers both served the Empress, and so we were together pretty much every day. Most people saw us basically as brothers, which is probably why we were both brought here. This way, we would have a friend and wouldn't be struck so hard by the changes."

"That explains a lot," Michelle commented, probably noting how similar they were. The two of them could of easily passed as brothers by blood, especially when Ryuuichi adopted his more childish persona. Shuuichi didn't mind the comparison, as he loved Ryuuichi as he would of loved a brother anyway.

"Well, shall we be on our way?" 


	3. Chapter 03

Chapter 3

The castle turned out to be a fair size. There were dungeons underground, as well cellars and storage rooms. Shuuichi knew that it was highly unlikely he would have to make his way down there, unless he was sent to retrieve wines or meals after the kitchens had closed for the night.

The first level was the level which held the entrance and main foyer. As such, it contained the different meeting halls for conferences and private discussions on one wing and the dining commons used for meals with family and guests on the other. Behind these, separated by several discrete doorways and hallways, were where the laundry and kitchens were. 

The second level was dedicated mostly to servant quarters, with a shared washing area. This floor had it's own staircase leading up from the kitchen and laundry area, and was one that the royal family very rarely visited.

The third floor held the extra rooms. Some of the rooms were used as classrooms for the princes, where they learned scripture and math's. Two were used as study's, one of which was completely forbidden in entering except by the king himself. Michelle didn't know the purpose of all of them, as she had no business in this part of the castle, but it appeared that all were in use except for one.

The final floor was the fourth, which held the separate bedrooms of the royal family.

Each floor had its own closets for linens and the like, which was definitely handy since things like bedsheets had to be changed each week. This was also where cleaning supplies and spare items like clean chamber pots and new shaving razors were stored.

Once they were finished the tour, his hand hurting from being shaken so many times, Shuuichi made his way back up to Prince Yuki's chambers with the evening platter in his hands.

Ryuuichi walked beside him, carrying Prince Tetsua's plate, a definite bounce in his step as he went. "And to think you were so nervous from meeting him! I'd say we are both lucky to be serving such attractive men," he was saying, having switched back to Japanese as they'd planned so that they wouldn't cause rumors.

"Men? You're the adult in your pair," Shuuichi commented.

Ryuuichi grinned widely. "Perhaps in age, but not in heart. Did you see their faces during the ceremony? I think both of these guys need some excitement in their life. And I don't mind exciting Tetsua at all!"

Shuuichi looked at his friend with wide eyes. "I've never heard you say something like that before!" he exclaimed.

"That's because I'd never met someone so amazing before. Come on, Shuuichi, you looked like you were going to pass out on the spot when you caught sight of your new master. It's the eyes, isn't it? That's what struck me so hard. Like your being pulled into the depths of the ocean, and not in a bad way. Tell me who could keep themselves from falling head over heals after meeting a gaze like that!"

Ryuuichi had him there, that was for sure. "Just don't get yourself hurt," he warned his friend. "These men aren't just anyone. They're princes. One day, we'll no longer be of use. And keep in mind that they'll probably get married some day, have kids. We're just their servants, Ryuu-chan. Even if that might mean taking care of physical needs once and a while, it also means that he probably won't fall in love with you."

"You don't need to remind me of that," Ryuuichi replied, his tone a little sharp. In just a moment, though, his usual smile was back. "But that doesn't mean I'm not going to enjoy it while I can!"

Shuuichi laughed and shook his head. "Story of your life, Ryuu-chan."

Although, he reminded himself that the same applied to himself too. He may of fallen head over heels, and he could enjoy it while it lasted, but Prince Yuki would never be really his. 


	4. Chapter 04

Chapter 4

Yuki opened the door to his chambers, feeling exhausted despite the fact he hadn't actually done anything physically tired that day. He'd been stuck in a meeting with his father and the advisors, listening to all of the matters of court and their suggestions. Then he'd had to involve himself in the discussion, despite the fact he didn't really care about the out come.

Ever since the day of his coronation he'd had to attend these meetings. In private, he'd told his father multiple times that he didn't want to inherit the crown after his passing. However, since he was the first born, his father was hearing none of it. It was his responsibility, whether he wanted it or not, and he had to learn what was necessary.

He was looking forward to having his meal, grabbing the book he was in the middle of, and crawling into bed.

However, just after closing the door, Yuki froze in place. Damn.... With all that had been going on, he'd actually forgotten.

His meal was on the table where he expected it, but this had to be one of the few times in his life where he'd entered his room only to find someone else already there. His new servant had separated a small plate for himself, and was curled up on the couch, stammering his way through a book while he ate.

He must of been concentrating rather hard, to not of heard the door shut. Yuki made throat-clearing sounds several times, but still didn't grab the boy's attention.

"Hey," he finally stated.

The brunette jumped, dropping the book and nearly dropping his plate as well. He quickly set both on the side table before getting to his feet, bowing deeply.

"I'm sorry, sir, I didn't hear you come in. I hope you don't mind, I was hungry and didn't think you would be upset if I only took a little. Can I prepare your dish for you? Would you like something to drink?"

"Stop babbling," Yuki snapped, feeling his headache throb a little more from the boy's nervous chatter.

The youth snapped his mouth shut, but continued to stare at him expectantly.

Yuki sighed, stepping over to the dining area of his common room. "When you bring the meal, feel free to separate what you want to eat and do so. I'll prepare my own dish and, as I see you forgot to bring the wine, I'd like you to go get some. I like water with my other meals, but I always take dinner with wine."

"Yes, sir!"

Yuki made a face. "Don't call me that. In private, just call me Yuki. I hate all of that 'sir', 'sire', 'my prince' crap. Only use the titles when someone else might overhear, got that?"

Shuuichi nodded before scampering out of the room to retrieve the wine.

The blonde began to make his way toward the table, but paused when he spotted the book that Shuuichi had been attempting to read. It was nothing for him, but probably quite difficult for someone who was using English for the first time. Yuki placed the book back on the shelf and selected one that would be easier for the brunette to read, placing it on the side table instead. If the kid wanted to read, let him. Maybe it would keep him occupied enough that he wouldn't feel the need to talk.

Dinner was the same as usual, and Yuki helped himself to the majority of it. He was glad the kitchen didn't give him extravagant meals when he ate in private, unlike when they had guests. He liked the odd treat of rare fruits and plush desserts, but he didn't like the thought of what he didn't eat being wasted. Hopefully the kid would eat the rest.

He almost sat down at the dinner table, but changed his mind. He preferred the more comfortable fabric chairs and he wasn't going to change just because Shuuichi was present. This was still his room, and he could do what he liked. If he wanted to walk around naked or dump his bookshelves on the floor, then it was his right!

Of course, he wouldn't do either, but he was at least going to sit in his favorite chair.

Shuuichi returned a short while later, quickly pouring a glass for each of them before returning to the couch. He picked up his plate, but didn't start eating. Instead, he continued to stare at Yuki.

The blonde tried to ignore him, but it was just too irritating. Finally, he set his fork down and fixed his gaze on the other. "What?"

Now that he actually had his attention, Shuuichi looked at a complete loss of what to do next. "Sorry, I didn't mean to stare. I'm just nervous, I guess."

Well, that was understandable. This was their first real meeting, after all. In order for Shuuichi to do his job properly, he probably needed at least a bit of information.

"Sorry," he said reluctantly. "I'm just not used to this idea yet. I didn't realize that you probably haven't the slightest idea what I want out of you. I'll tell you what I'm used to, you tell me if that's good for you, and we'll work from there, okay?"

Shuuichi gave him a brilliant smile that caught him off guard. He'd never seen someone with such an honest expression on his face. He liked it.

"Usually, on alternating days is when I have a bath. Otherwise, the wash basin is fine. Either is to be prepared before I wake. Because the time difference is several hours between our countries, I don't mind if you're late for a while. But try to get up on time as soon as possible. You'll retrieve the meal while I wash. I'll let you what I'm doing first, so you can lay out the appropriate clothing. Usually, it's matters of the court. Addressing visitors or meetings with the advisors. Someone will let you know when I'll be taking lunch. Afterward, I either go riding or attend classes. Dinner is always served at the same time, and the hours afterward I leave for myself. If there is a change in plans, or if I'll be taking a meal with someone, either I or someone else will let you know."

Shuuichi nodded slowly as he spoke. "When you say it like that, it seems pretty simple. I know it won't be as easy as that, but I'll ask if I run into a problem."

Yuki nodded. "That's best. I don't want you standing around wondering what to do, when it's just as easy to ask myself or someone else."

Quiet returned, and Yuki turned back to his meal.

Shuuichi was STILL staring at him.

"What?" he snapped.

The brunette flushed. "I just wanted to say.... Well, I'm honored to be your personal servant. I'll do my best."

Yuki felt bad for snapping after that. He shook his head slightly. "If I had been born to any other woman, I'd be just an ordinary man. My father made sure that Tetsua and I grew up knowing that. Our existence is built on the shoulders of others, and a ruler has to be aware of that if he doesn't want to get himself killed or overthrown. You'll act appropriately, as any person would, of course, but I'll also expect you to act like a real person. After you've finished your duties, your time is yours. Don't sit around, being bored. You can read, go for walk, do what you like."

"Thank you," Shuuichi replied, his eyes wide. Then his expression softened.

"Yuki." 


	5. Chapter 05

Chapter 5

After that, Shuuichi seemed satisfied, and Yuki was able to finish his meal in peace. He set his empty plate aside, retrieving his book before settling back into his chair. Despite the fact that the youth was quite as he set about cleaning up their dishes, Yuki couldn't seem to help but be distracted by him.

He had entertained the thought once, long ago, about what it would be like to have a male lover. However, due to his situation, he'd quickly dismissed the thought. As the eldest, he would have to take the throne. And with that responsibility came the fact that he would have to take a wife and produce an heir. So, despite the occasional whimsical thought that came to his mind, he kept himself strictly on the proper path.

Even so, his eyes wouldn't stop trailing over to the boy. After finishing his task, Shuuichi had gone back to his book. He was talking under his breath, lips moving in a silent monologue. Every once and a while, his tongue would peek out to moisten them. With the sun down, the candles played shadow's over Shuuichi's form, making his eyes and hair shimmer. His skin looked soft and smooth as ivory.

Even while sitting quietly, he was still in motion. One foot tapped silently against the couch cushion, one hand played with a pillow tassel. Yuki found himself watching the boy's hand, almost hypnotized by the fluent movement of Shuuichi's fingers as they caressed against the silk of the tassel.

Realizing what he was doing, Yuki jerked his eyes away and snapped his book shut. He'd read in his room, away from the distraction of having someone so close.

He forced himself to his feet, groaning slightly as pain stabbed through his back. Cushioned chairs were only used in chambers and studies, and so he's been stuck in an uncomfortable wooden one for most of the day. He was feeling it now, his back protesting strongly to his movements.

"Are you all right?" Shuuichi asked, having heard him.

Yuki shrugged, forcing himself not to look over at the boy. "Just sore from sitting in those uncomfortable chairs all day. It's a regular thing, no big deal."

"I could massage it for you. That's something that they teach us, and I'm sure I could help ease the pain."

The offer was way too tempting to refuse, no matter how much Yuki wanted to. He very rarely let anyone touch him. However, on rare occasions, he'd given in to the desire of a massage when he felt pain like this. Usually, he could resist the desire, but that was mostly because he didn't want the embarrassment of trying to find someone who would rub his back for him without getting the wrong idea. Half the time, he ended up asking his brother.

Another perk of having a personal assistant, especially since Shuuichi wouldn't go around gossiping with the girls about 'guess what I did last night!' He'd made that mistake once. Never again! Half the court had been convinced he'd taken her up as a mistress!

Yuki changed into his night clothes, which were actually just a pair of loose pants, then stretched himself out over his bed. For some reason, his pulse picked up a little when he felt the other crawl up next to him. It didn't take the blonde long to realize his mistake. He should of given his wayward thoughts a firm slap before agreeing to this.

Shuuichi's hands were warm and soft against his skin, gently running over the surface of his back a few times before strengthening. It was surprisingly painless as Shuuichi worked on the knots in his muscles, caressing along his shoulders and spine. He didn't know how long Shuuichi kept it up for, but he felt each and every one of his muscles slowly melt. The tension he always held in the small of his back seemed to disappear, replaced by warmth and tingling skin.

It was very different from massages from his brother. Those were quick and mechanical, working out the knots just enough that Yuki could move without pain before it was finished. The same as those he returned for his brother, getting rid of the trouble spots and that was it.

This felt... nice. Relaxing and arousing, calming and intimate. The feelings shocked him, even scared him a little, but even if he'd been able to move enough to push the youth away, Yuki didn't think himself capable of it. His body felt like it was floating, anchored only slightly by the caress of the hands over his skin.

He could only offer a slight moan, hardly in protest, before he found himself slipping off into sleep. 


	6. Chapter 06

Chapter 6

When he heard the gentle snoring, Shuuichi stopped and sat back. His wrists were hurting from his actions, but he didn't care. Yuki's skin had been just as silky as he'd first thought, his body just as leanly toned, and it had been too tempting to continue. It was going to be more difficult to keep an appropriate distance than he'd thought it would be. Even now, he wanted to settle himself down next to the blonde and snuggle up against his warm body.

With a sigh, Shuuichi forced himself off the bed. Still, he couldn't help reaching down and brushing Yuki's hair off his brow. His eyes trailed over blond lashes resting against still-soft cheeks, across the sharp nose to the slightly parted lips.

Yuki spoke sharply, but there was no malice behind it. And the fact that he'd done such a gesture as picking out a more suitable book for Shuuichi when he could of just done nothing spoke volumes.

He was in real danger here.

An instant, appearance-based love was easy. One could gain an infatuation at the drop of the hat, when in utter awe of another's beauty. To become breathless and wanting was as easy as a certain look, a certain touch.

But Yuki was a soft person hidden behind a hard shell, and Shuuichi found himself drawn to that. He wanted to work past whatever walls Yuki had built around himself. He wanted to draw out that kinder, gentler side of the other. He wanted to see a smile grace those lips and those eyes shine with warmth.

Damn. It seemed real love at first sight was possible after all....

Shuuichi opened his eyes, and gave a silent cheer when he realized it was still dark and Yuki was still asleep. He'd wanted to do his best right away, and getting up at the right time without having to ask another servant to give him a wake-up call was a big part of that. The cot had been surprisingly comfortable, although it was no prince's bed, and he'd slept well through the night.

He dressed as quickly as he could in the dark, then made his way down to the kitchens. He didn't know which of the alternate days it was, but he wanted to start off on a good foot. Besides, he was curious as to how many trips he would actually have to take.

The kitchen workers were already hard at work, boiling the vats of water and preparing the food to be cooked. Shuuichi was surprised when a girl was assigned to help him, but he was grateful for the aid. Carrying two buckets each, it still took over five trips to fill the bathtub just half way. It was something he was going to have to work on, because Shuuichi doubted he could of made all of those trips on his own even with the direct path from the servant staircase.

He woke Yuki immediately afterward, so that the water wouldn't become cold before the blonde could use it. Yuki mumbled something, making his way to the washroom with his eyes barely open. Shuuichi made a mental note that Yuki wasn't a morning person, knowing full well that those types tended to be grumpy.

Trying to ignore the thought of the blonde standing naked in the other room, Shuuichi set about choosing a light blue tunic with matching pants, setting them out along side the under clothes and a suitable belt. He'd forgotten to find out what Yuki would be doing first thing this morning, but he guessed that the clothes were both fancy and plain enough that they would probably suit anything.

That finished, he quickly scampered back down to the kitchen to retrieve Yuki's breakfast. As he'd expected, it was waiting for him, and he wasted no time getting back. It was a good thing that he WAS a morning person, or he'd probably of collapsed long ago.

After placing the dish on the dining table, Shuuichi was about to head back into the bedroom when he stopped dead in his tracks. He knew that it could be one of his duties to help the prince dress, but what if he walked in there and Yuki really was naked? He felt a flush come over his cheeks at the thought, and couldn't help but panic slightly. Yuki had wanted to change in private yesterday. What if Shuuichi did walk in on him? Would he get angry? Or would he act like nothing was out of the ordinary? Dear gods, what if he couldn't keep himself from staring? He'd seen naked people before, but not ones he felt so extremely attracted to. How could he keep his attraction a secret with the expanse of the other's nude body standing before him, open to plain view, shimmering golden in the sunlight peeking over the horizon....

Shuuichi almost jumped out of his skin when Sanzo walked into the room, fully clothed, hardly casting the youth a glance as he settled himself in front of the breakfast tray. Well, he certainly didn't need to worry about it now! Shuuichi mentally kicked his over-active imagination, heading into the washroom in an attempt to hide the blush he knew graced his cheeks.

He used the water that sat unused in the wash basin, giving his skin a quick scrub before leaning over the tub and pouring the remaining water through his hair. He shook out the locks to get the extra water off before reaching into the tub and pulling out the plug. It really was a smart idea, to add pipes which let out into gardens. He was certainly glad he didn't have to try to empty the tub!

Once he was certain he'd regained his composure, Shuuichi made his way back into the main room, intent on helping himself to some breakfast before it went cold. "Good morning," he ventured to the other as he separated a plate for himself.

Yuki made a grunting noise, still looking half-asleep as he worked slowly through his breakfast. Shuuichi stifled a giggle at the other man's behavior, taking a seat at the couch once again.

"There isn't much going on today, thankfully. I have the daily business with the advisors this morning. It usually takes up until around lunch hour, so I'll send someone to let you know when we're almost finished. Afterward, I have an appointment for a hunting lesson, so I'll need my jacket and rifle. It's the end of the week, so you'll also need to take care of the cleaning in here," Yuki informed him once he'd finished his breakfast. He looked a bit more alert now.

Shuuichi nodded, but didn't get the chance to reply before Yuki was heading out the door. He sat back, a little miffed, but knew that Yuki had more important things to do that sit around and chat with a servant.

He took his time with his own meal, grabbing fresh linens as he made his way back from returning the dishes. Opening the blinds helped recharge his slightly failing energy, the crisp air and the warm sunlight spilling over him. He definitely preferred sunlight over the dismal light of the small torches on the walls.

Heading into the bedroom, Shuuichi set about stripping Yuki's bed, resisting the temptation that came upon him to jump onto it again. It was filled with feathers, he realized after finding a wayward piece of down peeking through a small whole in the fabric. Damn, royalty really did have it better! He'd always assumed that things were basically similar, except for the amount of what was owned. Yuki had things so good. A well heated room, a great view of the courtyard and nearby town, more books than a person could read in a year, the freedom to head off to the gardens or stroll around the back woods once he'd finished his work, his own private bathroom....

And Shuuichi suddenly became truly aware of his position. It was his clothing which took up that extra drawer, his bed which shared Yuki's bedroom, his toiletries which sat next to the others. He was free to read any of those books that he wished, and could enjoy that view any time he liked. Yuki had even told him to do what he liked once he finished his duties for the day.

It was prestigious for a servant, and he knew that. Most rooms were shared, sometimes by three or four people, bare with only the chamber pot in the corner. They would have something to put their clothing in, of course, but most were denied even the luxury of a window because of the placement in the building. The kitchen and laundry staff worked from the moment they got up to the moment they went to bed, those being two of the most important jobs when it came to running a palace. Then there were the cleaning staff, those who had to kneel most of the day trying to scrub the dirt out of the floors, or travel to each individual room in order to fluff the dust out of the hangings and draperies.

Shuuichi mechanically unraveled the bottom sheet, waving it a few times to help work out the stiffness in the fabric before stretching it out over the mattress. He really was fortunate, to of been given this job. He would be busy, but he liked the feeling of satisfaction after a day of accomplishments. Besides, anything would be worth it to be able to share a life with Yuki.

The brunette flushed a little at the thought, pulling the fresh blankets and Yuki's quilt back into their proper place. He hoped that things worked out well between them. Yuki couldn't be liking having his privacy invaded so thoroughly. Shuuichi vowed that he would do the best that he could, and make Yuki happy in every way that was possible. He would make sure the blonde's life went as smoothly as possible, would keep his mouth shut when the blonde wanted quiet, rub the man's back when he was in pain, whisk in the food when he was hungry, prepare whatever was necessary whenever Yuki needed it.

Maybe the man would come to appreciate, perhaps even want, his presence. Maybe Yuki would begin to think of him as a friend instead of forced company.

Maybe Yuki would see him as a lover, instead of just an employee.

Okay, THAT was unlikely, and Shuuichi knew it full well. Still, that didn't stop him from day dreaming as he went about tidying. 


	7. Chapter 07

Chapter 7

It was late when Yuki returned to his room, the sun already below the horizon. He had spent most of his day in town, having sneaked off once his fencing lesson was complete. His father didn't approve of heading into town without the proper accompaniment, but Yuki hated drawing so much attention to himself. He preferred just to slip in and get what he wanted before returning home, without having to deal with fawning townspeople hoping for a chance to catch a look at him.

Under normal circumstances, he would of just sent someone in to get what he wanted for him. Whomever would be able to tell quality in the item he wanted. This time, however, he was getting a gift for his brother's upcoming birthday and had wanted to select it out himself. Tetsua was a good brother and son, but his tastes were whimsical. Yuki had wanted to make sure it was something his brother would actually like for more than a couple of days, and had finally settled on a dragon cape brooch. The phoenix was their family crest, so it was rare that either brother was able to find something of any other fantasy creature. As a bonus, Tetsua had always preferred the fairy tales containing dragons and dragon slayers.

He hadn't seen much of his brother lately, Yuki realized with a frown. Since his coronation, they had stopped attending the same lessons, Yuki being forced to attend to ones which dealt with his upcoming responsibilities. He'd heard that Tetsua had taken up to spending a lot of time in his room, which as odd in itself. His brother usually spent every spare moment outdoors.

Making a mental note to pop in on his brother one of these days, the blonde pulled off his jacket, draping it across the couch. He was surprised when he spotted a dish on the table in the dim light. He'd missed supper by several hours.

Coming closer, he saw that the quickly perishable things had been removed, but those that could sit for a while were still waiting for him. Yuki couldn't help but be more than a little pleased. He'd been expecting to have an empty stomach that night, as the kitchens closed down not long after serving the final meal.

Curiosity getting the better of him, Yuki peered into the bedroom. As he'd thought, Shuuichi was already asleep, his blankets thrown off and one leg hanging off the edge of his bed. Yuki had come to learn quite a bit about the youth in the week that he'd been serving him. Shuuichi worked very hard through the day, sometimes even helping the other servants when he had spare time, and always fell asleep not long after dinner. Yuki usually stayed up later, reading, and was used to entering his bedroom only to see the youth hanging halfway off his bed. He snored too, but looked just so damned adorable that Yuki couldn't get annoyed over it.

Unable to help a small smile, Yuki retrieved the blanket from the floor and placed it over the sleeping figure, moving Shuuichi's leg as gently as he could so that it was back on the thin mattress. He hesitated for a moment, bent over Shuuichi's form. He couldn't seem to gain the will power to keep his hand from gently tracing over one cheek, trailing down to the boy's parted lips. His eyes glided along the line of the cheekbone, down the line of Shuuichi's jaw and the gentle slope of his neck.

He was more of a distraction than Yuki would of thought, and he wasn't talking about the chatter and constant motion. He'd always thought that he would hate having to share such close proximity with another, but found a certain comfort in receiving Shuuichi's welcoming smile when he returned from his daily duties. Suddenly his room seemed like more of a home than he'd ever thought of the castle he lived in.

Giving himself a mental shake, Yuki pulled his hand away and returned to the dinner table. It was hard to believe that just a week ago he'd been doing his best to think of a way to dump the boy off on someone else. There were still moments, usually when Shuuichi's babble-like conversation started to get on his nerves, but they were quickly being replaced more and more often by thoughts of desire.

He'd even thought once of shutting the boy up by kissing him!

Perhaps it would be best to find someone else for Shuuichi to serve. Someone with a high status, so the boy wouldn't feel like he was being demoted. He was becoming far too tempting, and Yuki's more irrational side wanted to take advantage of their solitude. He knew that many men used their personal assistants for sexual release. It was just part of the job, until a mistress was taken up. But Yuki feared the consequence of that action.

He didn't think he could sleep with anyone without the emotion of love getting involved.

And, as he'd reminded himself all too often this last week, that was impossible for him. To take up a male lover was scandalous for one. It was firmly believed that a real man found pleasures in the softer sex, despite the fact Yuki could list at least three past ruler whom had preferred the male gender. If his father were to find out, Yuki knew he'd likely get a whipping, despite the fact his father hadn't punished him that was since he was kid. His father had always held an almost obsession-like fondness for propriety.

For another, he couldn't do that to Shuuichi. Yuki would never be the type of person who could force another into sex. He knew some men considered it their right, but the idea disgusted him. He had caught Shuuichi watching him on a few occasions, but doubted in this day and age that any man would be comfortable with another man's touch. It was just too abnormal.

He had to focus on the future that had been thrust upon him, and get rid of these whimsical thoughts of 'what if'. His father was getting on in years and, although he seemed perfectly healthy, there were many calamities that could strike a man of his age. It would be the day of his father's death that Yuki would be expected to take the throne. Despite the fact he didn't want to in the least, it wasn't exactly something he could refuse. His father had laughed outright when he'd suggested handing the title to Tetsua, who was the one that actually did have the skill and interest to run a country. To the king, it was preposterous that anyone other than the eldest son have the right to become the next ruler.

His fingers hitting bare metal brought Yuki out of his thoughts, realizing that he'd finished his meal without even realizing he'd taken a bite. He debated returning the dish on his own, just so the room would be tidy once again, but dismissed it when he realized he couldn't recall where the kitchen was.

Instead, the blonde made his way to the bedroom. He changed as quietly as he could, sneaking a glance at Shuuichi once again. Yuki frowned when he saw that Shuuichi's blanket and leg had fallen back off the cot. He hadn't realized how narrow the bed was. How could the brunette sleep so deeply, on something with so little room?

Why did it bother him?

It was the same kind bed as most other people had. Better, actually, in that it had never been used before. There just weren't enough birds in the world to give everyone a down-filled mattress. Still, it bothered him that someone who did as much physical work though the day as Shuuichi did would have to try and sleep on that. All of those trips up and down four flights worth of stairs, lugging around heavy things, all of it just so Yuki would have clean water and warm food. His muscles must of been jelly by the end of the day. Yuki knew he wouldn't be able to get a good night's rest on that!

He replaced the leg and blanket quickly, refusing to let himself linger once again. However, after crawling into his own bed, Yuki could only stare up at the ceiling. He couldn't seem to get rid of the nagging guilt in the back of his mind. It didn't seem fair that he would have all this room on such a comfortable bed, while the other slept only a few feet away on something narrow and hard.

He told himself that this was just how things were in the world, for those who ruled and those who were ruled. In the end, though, he knew he wasn't going to get a wink of sleep if he didn't do something about it. 


	8. Chapter 08

Chapter 8

Instinct had Shuuichi's eyes open in plenty of time to get his morning duties started. However, a sense of wrongness came over him so strongly that he froze in place. It took him a few minutes to realize he was sleeping on Yuki's bed, recognizing the feel of cushioning mattress.

The youth swore mentally. He could of sworn he'd gone to his own bed. Had he been so tired that he'd gotten confused? It seemed impossible, considering the difference, but what other reason was there? Maybe he'd walked in his sleep? That seemed equally unbelievable. He'd never slept walk in his life.

He was so embarrassed. Yuki must of been shocked to see him there. He might even be mad from Shuuichi doing something so improper as laying in his bed. Why hadn't the blonde woken him up to correct the problem?

Maybe Yuki hadn't returned last night? Shuuichi frowned at the thought, worry shooting through him. He'd fallen asleep before Yuki had returned, simply assuming that the man was busy with his duties. What if the blonde had gotten hurt, and that was why he hadn't woken Shuuichi up?

Shuuichi ventured a glance around, his eyes shooting wide when he saw Yuki laying next to him, as deeply asleep as he would of been any other night.

Okay....

So maybe he had walked in his sleep, crawling into bed next to the other after Yuki had already gone to sleep. It was the only thing that made any sense.

Unless Yuki had decided to just let him stay there, after he'd somehow worked his self over to his master's bed.

Yeah, that was believable.

He just couldn't figure this out!

With a shake of his head, the youth got out of the bed as smoothly as he could, not wanting to wake the sleeping prince. He made his way to the door, retrieving the bucket of warm water waiting there before making his way back so he could pour it in the wash basin.

He paused when he saw his own bed, the blanket neatly folded and resting on his pillow.

He had to get to the bottom of this. The idea of him sleep walking might of been feasible, but folding up his blanket so neatly too? Obviously, someone had moved him. But who would of come into Yuki's chambers besides Yuki himself?

Maybe someone was playing a trick on him. Trying to make him look bad, by sticking him in the bed next to the blonde and making it look like he'd crawled in there on his own. That would of made sense, except for the fact that everyone knew he woke up before the other.

He would get to the bottom of this, Shuuichi promised himself as he set up Yuki's toiletries so that they would be readily accessible.

His efforts turned out to be pointless, though.

"Day off, sleeping," Yuki mumbled when Shuuichi attempted to wake him, promptly rolling over and pulling the blankets over his head.

Dammit! Yuki had a bad habit of forgetting to tell him what he was doing the next day. It wasn't that big of a deal, except when it came to days like these where the usual schedule changed. At least it wasn't something big, like two days ago when Yuki'd had to entertain a guest with his father, and Shuuichi had to scramble to find the prince's nicer clothing while Yuki himself hid in the bathroom, wrapped in a towel.

It seemed there was nothing to do until Yuki woke, so Shuuichi tried to think of something quiet he could do. Unable to resist the temptation of an opportunity to take a bath like he was accustomed to, Shuuichi quickly set about asked the kitchen if they could spare two barrels of water. He had tried to take a bath like Yuki did, but found the idea of sitting in water littered with the dirt off his body too unappealing to try it again. He just hadn't felt clean afterward.

He left the door ajar enough so that Yuki would be able to tell he was using the washroom if he were to happen to wake up, then stripped off his clothes and stepped into the bathtub.

Now was the time for a proper Japanese cleaning!

With a huff of frustration, Yuki threw the blanket off of his head and turned around to glare. He didn't know if Shuuichi was in the room, but he wanted to be glaring when he happened to see the other. It was his own damned fault, really, for forgetting to let the youth know that he finally had a day off. But he still wasn't happy about not being able to fall back asleep. His body was just too used to having to force itself up when he was woken.

Shuuichi wasn't visible, but Yuki wasn't worried. He'd probably gone down to get the breakfast, which was still served at the same time.

The blonde forced himself out of bed, turning his glare toward the window where he could see the dawn's first light starting to sneak through the curtain. It was entirely pointless, of course, so he decided he would make use of the toiletries Shuuichi had gotten ready for him.

Yuki opened the unlatched door, then swiftly jerked it back to its original position, his heart seeming to pound in his ears. Why hadn't he stopped to consider that Shuuichi might of taken the moment to tend to himself? Yuki wasn't the center of the world!

Still... what the hell was he doing? The blonde (completely unwillingly, for the record) peeked his eye around the door, his brow furrowed. The brunette was sitting in the empty tub, mostly turned away from the door, furiously scrubbing his feet with soap. Why the hell hadn't he gotten any water? Yuki could see a film of soap over Shuuichi's skin, his eyes trailing along the youth's slender shoulders before moving down the line of his back.

When his eyes reached the other's buttox, Yuki finally seemed to realize that he was spying on the kid and jerked his gaze away. He'd never seen anyone naked before. Well, statues and paintings, but those didn't count. A real naked body was very different!

He had to get control of his hormones! And he had to move away from the bathroom door. Yet, whatever it was that was making his pulse race so quickly also seemed to of paralyzed his feet, and the temptation to sneak another peek was almost overwhelming. The sight of the other seemed burned in his mind, teasing him more with what he hadn't seen. He wanted to see the tightness of Shuuichi's stomach, the lean muscles of his chest, the curve of his collar bone.

He wanted to touch those plains and dips, run his hands along the gentle curve of that spine, run his fingers though the slightly wild chestnut hair, and finally taste those lips.

Yuki shuddered, pushing himself away from the door with determined steps, grabbing a random set of clothing out of his dresser without bothering to look. It had been a mistake to bring the boy into his bed. It had been all he could do not to give into the desire to pull Shuuichi close to him, feel the comforting warmth of the other's form against his own. He'd dreamed about doing just that, and more, waking the startled youth with lips against his navel, letting his hands wander over skin that felt like silk.

He would take a walk this morning, before his lunch with his family, Yuki decided, firmly turning his thoughts to something much healthier for his sanity. His father always had he and Tetsua carefully watched on their days off, to make sure they didn't try to head off to town on their own. Hence why Yuki had made his trip last night, when his father assumed he would be too tired after his day of meetings and studies to make the trip.

Perhaps he could find Tetsua. His brother might of been spending more time in his room than normal, but there was no way he would waste a day off by staying indoors. They only got one every two weeks, sometimes even just once a month. They could head out into the woods, goof off among the trees like they hadn't since childhood. Yuki could use an escape from all of the pressures he was feeling, a chance to pretend he was a kid again, without all of those responsibilities and tensions sitting on his shoulders.

Yuki gave a short laugh at his thoughts. There was no real point in trying to escape. They would all be waiting for him once he got back, and they would feel that much more stifling.

"Um... could you pass me a pair of pants?"

The blonde looked up at Shuuichi's voice, spotting half a face peeking out from behind the almost-shut door. The youth gave him a sheepish grin. "I remembered a towel, but forgot a change of clothes."

Yuki opened up Shuuichi's drawer, selecting out a green set of clothing. There wasn't actually much to choose from, the brunette only had three sets of clothes. Funny, Yuki hadn't even noticed. He would need to look into getting Shuuichi more, especially something a bit fancier for when he accompanied Yuki on travels and the like. It would look bad for him, to have a personal assistant wearing such simple clothes.

"So, it's your day off today," Shuuichi commented, speaking through the door as he changed. "Do you have any specific plans?"

"Not really. We'll be having lunch with my father and brother," Yuki replied.

Shuuichi emerged from the washroom, looking confused. "Why will I be there?"

Yuki blinked at the question, then realized he hadn't taken any public meals in the week Shuuichi had been with him. "Any time I have a meal with my family, or with guests, you'll be required to be there. It's mostly just for show, but you'll pour my drinks, clear the food away afterward, and such things like that."

"I didn't realize that I would be doing things like that."

"Ah, I must of forgotten to explain those kinds of duties since I haven't had to deal with any of them yet. You're supposed to accompany me if I go out, riding or traveling, hunting parties, things like that. If we have any ceremonial meetings, you'll be there too, although I doubt there will be much for you to do. Honestly, you're supposed to come with me everywhere that I go, but I didn't see the point of dragging you into my advisory meetings and classes. It would be a waste of your time, when you've already got so much to do, especially since I don't need you then."

The brunette nodded at his words, then gave him a smile. "Make sure you call when you do need me, though. I've been spending my spare time helping others with their chores so that I'm not just sitting around, but I don't mind spending that time with you. Especially if it ends up that you do need a hand. I'm not doing my job properly if I'm not around to help you."

His father had actually made a similar comment on two separate occasions last week. "You are making use of your assistant, are you? I don't want to be paying someone for sitting on their ass all day! You make sure that he's doing his job."

"If I need you, you'll know," Yuki replied simply.

"Right. Well, I'll run down and get breakfast. What are you going to be doing before lunch?"

"I think I'll just go out for a walk around the grounds, get some fresh air."

Shuuichi's gaze met his own. "Ah, then I'm supposed to accompany you out, right?"

Yuki hesitated, caught between yes and no. Shuuichi was supposed to come with him, in case he needed anything while he was out. At the same time, he was used to being alone and the point had been to find himself a distraction from thoughts of the youth.

In the end, he agreed. He had to be honest with himself with the fact that he wanted the youth's company. If he'd said no, the walk would of been ruined anyway because all he would of thought about was how much he regretted saying no. As sad as that was for a crowned prince, it was the truth. He had to avoid the temptations of the flesh, but that didn't mean he couldn't enjoy the other's company. They were living together anyway.

Why were these excuses so easy to think up? 


	9. Chapter 09

Chapter 9

The outer grounds of the castle actually took up a good acre or more, protected by a tall stone fence that wound a large circle around it. The front area, that which would be seen immediately by a visitor, was perfectly groomed. Lush grass, tall trees, with a generously sized garden along the right side and the stables off to the left. The back was where they hid the food gardens and livestock, with the farthest area of land saved for waste.

Shuuichi trailed after Yuki as they made their way out of the castle, a little surprised to realize that he hadn't actually been outside since the day he'd been shown around. He just hadn't had the time. Despite the fact that he'd spent a lot of his free time looking out the windows, he found that it was not a good enough substitute now that he was actually outdoors.

He couldn't resist the temptation of removing his shoes, enjoying the feel of the soft grass beneath his feet. The fresh scent of the air invigorated him, and Shuuichi lapped up the feel of sunlight and wind against his skin. The spring air was still slightly cold, but he was too happy to care.

"It's so nice to be outside," he said happily, giving Yuki a wide smile. "We have to get out more often! I didn't realize until just now how cooped up we are in those rooms. From now on, the two of us spend at least one evening outside, okay? As the servant in charge of your personal welfare, I demand it!"

He almost had a heart attack when Yuki smiled at him, his pulse lurching at the sight. Shuuichi had never seen him smile before, the blonde's expression either blank, bored, or stressed. It transformed Yuki's face, softened the curve of his cheeks and made his eyes lighten. Unfortunately, it was gone almost an instant after appearing.

"You seem especially cheerful today," Yuki commented.

Shuuichi couldn't seem to get the grin off his face. "I feel completely rejuvenated today! I bet it has something to do with getting the best sleep of my life," he replied. Then he flushed scarlet when he realized what he'd blurted out. "Ah, I'm sorry about that. I don't know how I got into your bed. I thought I must of walked in my sleep or something, even though that doesn't make any sense, but I promise it won't happen again. I hope you weren't too upset by it."

"Stop babbling," Yuki said, cutting off his words. "That stupid cot just looked so uncomfortable, especially for someone who does so much physical work every day. I moved you."

He could feel his flush deepen at the thought of Yuki carrying him to his bed. "I... Well, thank you. It did make a difference. I slept really well," he stammered, at a complete loss as to the proper way he was to react to this. They hadn't exactly taught him what to do when his master brought him to his bed.

Well, okay, they had. But not in this sense of it.

"It's nothing," Yuki stated sharply, breaking off Shuuichi's startled thoughts. "I just thought you could use a night on a more comfortable bed. Don't think it's going to happen often."

Shuuichi nodded silently, a little disappointed at the blonde's harsh words. Still, he couldn't help but notice 'often' instead of 'again'. It was likely just a slip of the tongue, but he couldn't help but store the fact in the hopeful little part of his brain.

"Anyway, you'll have to keep that mouth of yours shut during lunch. I might be able to tolerate it, but my father won't. It's not proper, of course. After the meal has started, you can talk with the other one... ah... Tetsua's. I can't remember the name. But you'll need to keep your voices down, and keep an ear out if I need you," the blonde quickly continued.

Shuuichi perked up at the thought of seeing Ryuuichi. He hadn't had a chance to meet up with him, both of them being busy with their duties. It was kind of sad, since their respective rooms were only a few second's walk away. He wanted to know how things were going for his friend, if he had settled in as well as Shuuichi had.

As it turned out, he didn't have to wait the few more hours until lunch. They'd strolled there way into the gardens, only to find Tetsua and Ryuuichi a few paces ahead, laughing over something.

"Ryuu-chan!" Shuuichi exclaimed, unable to help from running up to his friend. He ignored the stares of the people around them as he leapt at Ryuuichi's back, laughing. Most of them were staring at the princes anyway.

The young man turned, a smile erupting on his face. "Shuu-chan!" he yelled in return, grabbing Shuuichi around the neck and furiously ruffling his hair. "I haven't seen you in a whole week! How are you? Are things going good? Have you seen him naked?"

Shuuichi laughed, pushing at the hand still messing his hair. "Fine, yes, and no!" he replied, rolling his eyes.

"Ah! Then you're not enjoying yourself as much as I am," the other replied, breaking into fit of giggles.

"What?!"

It was a little disconcerting, watching two people chat so happily in a language you didn't know one word of. Especially when those two people could of passed for twins, if it wasn't for the slight difference in the shade of hair and eyes.

"So, the hermit actually left his room!" his brother greeting, grinning at him. "I don't think I've actually seen you in the gardens for a good five years."

Yuki continued to watched the pair for a second, then had to admit it wasn't doing much good when he didn't understand a word they were saying. He turned to his brother, and taken off guard a little by the expression on his face. He'd never seen Tetsua looking... blissful. He was a naturally happy person, but Yuki couldn't remember seeing such honest happiness on his brother's face.

His eyes narrowed and he leaned in close to his brother. "What is going on with you?" he questioned, whispering so they wouldn't be overheard.

Tetsua blinked at him, then tried to look innocent even while a flush started to work along his cheeks. "What do you mean?"

"I mean the fact that I heard you've hardly left your room in the last week. And the expression on your face. Don't try to lie to me, I know something's going on."

Ryuuichi gave him a serious look, then a silly grin came over his lips. "I couldn't help it. It was love at first sight. I mean, just look at him. He's gorgeous. And it's not just that. He's fun and nice and doesn't mind hearing my stories over and over. At first, I thought it was just an attraction. But it didn't take long to become more."

"Are you crazy?" Yuki hissed, consciously having to remind himself to keep his tone down.

Tetsua's expression didn't change. "Probably, but I don't care. I had no idea how lonely I really was, until Ryuuichi came into my life. You know what it's like, Yuki. All of those people I know, the only reason they like me is because of what I am, not who I am. The only reason they pay the least bit of attention to me is because they have to...."

Tetsua trailed off, his expression saddened, but he continued before Yuki could think of something to say.

"I love him." 


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Yuki knew his father was talking, but couldn't seem to bring himself to pay attention to a word of it. He stared down at his food, but hardly noticed it. His brother's words from earlier seemed to echo in his mind.

'... how lonely I really was...'

'... what I am, not who I am...'

'... because they have to...'

'It was love at first sight.'

'You know what it's like.'

'I love him.'

Was it as easy at that?

Just fall in love and be together.

Tetsua was blissfully unaware of any consequences to his actions, although he was still smart enough to keep it a secret. And Yuki had to admit he envied that. Even if Tetsua was found out, the worst that could happen was a punishment. There was no real reason for the two of them not to be together. Tetsua didn't have the expectation of having to produce an heir in his future.

Part of him still didn't believe what his brother had told him. How could anyone fall in love in a week? How could his brother just forget that which was expected of him? It may not of been forbidden, but Tetsua had always done his best to avoid their father's anger. How could he be so willing to be shunned, if he were found out? Never mind the gay relationship, there was the fact that Ryuuichi was also a servant! Was it really worth throwing away all that Tetsua had strived for in his life, to be with this person?

And why was he so jealous?

Despite all of the things wrong about it, Yuki couldn't help but be happy for his brother. He didn't know if it was something that would last forever, but Tetsua was the happiest that he'd ever been, and it showed. Perhaps not well enough for others to see, but Yuki could read his brother's face plainly. Was it really possible for just one person to create such strong emotion?

Yuki closed his eyes and sighed. Yes, he knew damned well that it was.

Unable to help himself, the blonde snuck a peek at the servant table.

Shuuichi flushed, and quickly jerked his gaze away. He couldn't believe that Yuki had caught him watching. Again. He wasn't doing a very good job of keeping his feelings a secret. He couldn't keep himself from wondering if Yuki shared more characteristics with his brother than just eyes. The blonde had made no sign of it, but could it be possible that he might find males to be more appealing?

He should put that thought out of his mind right now, before he kidded himself into thinking it might be true. Yuki didn't seem to mind having him around, but that was a far cry from wanting him sexually.

Even so, he couldn't keep himself from wishing.

"You're lucky," he sighed, looking up at Ryuuichi.

After Shuuichi's initial shock had worn off, Ryuuichi had gone on to tell him about his relationship. The days of sharing each other's company, silently supporting each other as they worked through their respective duties. The evenings, exchanging stories and jokes, laughing together as they sat next to the fire place. The nights, cuddled warmly together, sharing whispered hopes and aspirations for the future, and a little bit more.

Shuuichi couldn't help being jealous along with happy for his friend.

Ryuuichi gave him a guilty look. "I'm sorry, I should of thought about your situation before I blabbed all of that. You really have fallen in love with him, haven't you?"

The brunette sighed, pushing his food around on his plate with his fork. "For all the good it's done me. How could I of been so stupid?"

"Don't say something like that," Ryuuichi scolded. "You can't stop your heart from feeling what it wants to."

"Still, of all the people in the world, I have to fall for one that's going to be a king some day. I mean, I wouldn't be having this problem if I'd managed to fall in love with anyone else."

Ryuuichi gave him a speculative look. "Is that the only reason? I mean, it's completely possible for you to be his lover, as long as he still produces an heir sometime down the road."

Shuuichi shook his head. "I don't know if he even likes men," he confessed.

"Don't you mean boys?"

Shuuichi couldn't keep his lips from quirking at his friend's teasing comment. "I'll be of adult age come by next birthday, and you know that."

"I was just trying to get you to smile. And I succeeded! You shouldn't look so sad, Shuu-chan, it doesn't suit you. Why don't we talk about something else?"

Shuuichi was glad for the opportunity, perfectly willing to put those troubling thoughts to the side. "What do you have in mind?"

"Well, how about that girl in the gardens. I don't know who she was, she just stopped for a second on her way by, but she was glaring at you."

Shuuichi frowned in confusion, until he recalled the warning he'd been given on the day he arrived. "It must of been Samantha. Michelle warned me about her before our tour. She tends the gardens, but apparently had been trying to be appointed as Yuki's assistant for a long time."

"I'd be careful of her," Ryuuichi advised. "She looked furious."

"I will," Shuuichi promised.

The conversation ended there, Ryuuichi being called to refill Tetsua's cup. Shuuichi was called as well and the three of them; the king's assistant had been waiting by his chair; cleared the supper dishes away and replaced them with dessert.

After lunch was over, Shuuichi bid his friend goodbye and followed Yuki back up to his chambers. The blonde selected a book and took a seat in his favorite chair, while Shuuichi stood about idly. He had nothing to do until dinner unless Yuki actually asked for something, and didn't feel like reading today. Unfortunately, he couldn't think of anything else there was to do.

"You don't have to just stand there, you know. You're free until supper," Yuki commented without looking up from his book.

"Are you sure you won't need me?" Shuuichi asked uncertainly.

"I won't. I'm just going to relax."

The brunette still hesitated, but after a long moment of being ignored, made his way out of the room. He decided that he'd go out again, since he didn't know when he would have another opportunity to just wander about outdoors.

The sun was still high, the sky cloudless, when Shuuichi stepped out into the courtyard. He settled himself down on the grass, watching the people come and go from the open gateway in the fence. Most carried the new supplies that the castle would need in the upcoming week, such as the food which was supplied from the town. The castle itself didn't have enough room to grow enough crops for all of the people that worked there. A few carried artifacts such as new tapestries and linens, which would no doubt be appraised by the appropriate people before presented to the king for final approval. It was surprising how quickly things could wear down from use, or even just from sitting out where they became covered in dust. Anything that was missed during cleaning often ended up so covered in filth that it was simply easier to just replace it.

It wasn't too long before Shuuichi became restless, though. It seemed he was never able to sit still for too long. He liked to be in motion, even if it was pointless motion, just so he wasn't doing nothing at all. He'd tried to curb the desire, since he knew it annoyed Yuki to no end, but hadn't made any progress so far.

Getting to his feet, the youth wandered aimlessly for a while, once again becoming lost in his thoughts of the prince. It seemed to be becoming a habit. If he wasn't entirely caught up in whatever he was doing, his thoughts would almost automatically turn back to Yuki. Another thing he couldn't seem to keep himself from doing.

The feeling of being watched broke him from the thoughts, and Shuuichi was surprised to see that he was in the gardens once again. He hadn't even noticed. The brunette glanced around, spotting a young woman only a short distance away. He hadn't seen her before, but it wasn't a long shot to guess from her glare that it was Samantha.

He turned to go, but it seemed she wasn't about to let him leave without the confrontation he'd wanted to avoid.

"You can stop walking around with that smug look on your face. Everyone knows you're not good enough to serve under Prince Yuki. You don't even have the brains enough to remember to bring water with you when Prince Yuki goes out."

He couldn't keep himself from getting angry at the barb. "If he'd wanted it, he would of asked for it."

"It's the job of a servant to expect the needs of the master, or didn't they teach you that? You did nothing to earn your position, so don't get too comfortable. I could do a much better job than you ever could, and Prince Yuki will realize that."

"Then why don't you have the job?" Shuuichi taunted.

He regretted it when he saw the flash of fury in her eyes. In that moment, he realized that this went deeper than just jealousy over the position. This was much more personal than that, a jealousy over Yuki himself. The girl was obviously infatuated.

"You don't belong here. One just has to look at you to see that. An exotic gift from the East, what a joke. You won't last another week."

This time, Shuuichi refused to raise to the bait. He clenched his teeth to keep from snapping back, turning sharply on his heel and walking away. Samantha continued to toss insults after him, but thankfully didn't follow.

An exotic gift from the East.

That's what Marihoto had said while first presenting himself and Ryuuichi. The racial slur had hurt, despite the shallowness behind it. As he thought about it, though, Shuuichi realized that he had yet to see anyone of another race other than white since arriving, save for Ryuuichi of course. Everyone had been kind to him, and he'd spent so much time in Yuki's chambers, that he hadn't really noticed.

Suddenly he felt very small. And very alone. They had warned him of the shock when being placed in a different culture, but he hadn't really understood until now. The entire culture was so different. The food, the music, the language and customs. Even the clothes! Other than Ryuuichi, there was no one here that understood the world he'd come from, no one that would understand a word out of his mouth if he didn't speak in English. And that thought alone was humbling.

He'd been so excited when he'd heard that he would be moving to the West. It was a great honor to help his Emperor and homeland by giving himself over in order to build a friendship between the nations. It had seemed so spectacular, going to live in a strange new world.

But he had given up everything in the process. He'd been so caught up in his excitement that it hadn't even occurred to him that he might grow to miss his country. He probably wouldn't even see his parents again. His home was so far away, Shuuichi nearly cried at the thought.

It wasn't worth it. Traveling all this way, leaving all that he'd known, just to fall in love with a man who would never return his feelings.

It wasn't worth it. 


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

Yuki sighed when a knock came to his door, putting his book to the side without bothering to save the page. He'd only managed to read the first paragraph. It didn't seem to matter that he'd gotten rid of the living distraction, his thoughts had filled in for him after Shuuichi had left.

He got to his feet, pulling the door open to reveal his brother standing there. He raised an eyebrow. "Since when do you knock?"

"Wow, you made a joke. Left the house, and gained a minute sense of humor. You really are a changed man!" Tetsua exclaimed, laughing as he made his way into the room. "I saw Shuuichi leave, and I wanted to talk to you in private."

"What about?" Yuki questioned, taking his seat once again.

"Ah, well, Shuuichi and Ryuuichi were so happy to visit today. The two of them grew up together, you know. I felt bad for not realizing that they'd want to spend time together. I wanted to ask if it was okay for the two of us, or even just Ryuuichi, to come by for a visit once and a while. Or for Shuuichi to come see him."

Yuki was puzzled by his brother's words. "Of course they can. It wouldn't take much to line up their breaks, or have dinner together once and a while. You used to take your evening meal here once a week. But you didn't have to see me in private about that."

His brother grinned. "You called me on it sooner than I thought. You know, you aren't the only brother that can read his brother's face better than anyone else."

Yuki frowned. "What are you talking about?"

Tetsua shook his head. "Don't play dumb with me. It's as plain on your face as a cloud is in the sky. I saw the way you were looking at Shuuichi today. And just the fact that you looked at him spoke volumes. You're very talented at ignoring the world around you."

Yuki shifted uncomfortably, not liking the turn this conversation had taken. "He's my servant, of course I'm going to need to look at him," he replied evasively.

Not evasively enough, it seemed, as Tetsua snorted and rolled his eyes. "Right. Everyone stares after their servants like a starving puppy being teased by a bone."

"It's nothing like that!" Yuki exclaimed. "Anyway, I don't think it's any of your business!"

"It's my business because I've never seen you look at anything that way before. Everyone else is too blind to realize it, but you can't lie to me, Yuki. I was the one that stayed up to ungodly hours of the night, helping you study. I was the one that held your hair with you when you threw up during the flu. I was the one rubbed your back when you were in so much pain you could barely walk. And I was the only one who was there for you when we were growing up. You may think that you've built this perfect wall around your emotions, but you know just as much as I do that it's a farce. You feel just as much as anyone else, and just as strongly, and I'm not going to sit here and let you pretend that nothing's changed."

The blonde could only stare at his brother, shocked by Tetsua's outburst. The younger man was very good at making him feel guilty, and he did for thinking his brother was just as oblivious as everyone else. With a mother that had passed away when they were still very young, and a father who was too caught up in matters of the court to pay them much attention, the two boys had depended on each other for most of their lives. They had a sister, but she'd been wedded off when Yuki was eight, and he couldn't even remember her face anymore.

With a sigh of frustration, Yuki brought his hands up to his face and rubbed at the arch of his hairline. "It's not the same for me as it is for you, you know."

"So? It doesn't mean that you can't be happy. I don't know exactly what you feel for Shuuichi, but I know something's there. Why don't you do something about it?"

Yuki shook his head, meeting his brother's eyes. "You wouldn't be able to understand, Tetsua, the amount of responsibility sitting on my shoulders. If I give even a little, it could all come crashing down on me. It doesn't matter what I feel, it's just not possible."

Tetsua studied his face for a moment, then shook his head and sighed. "I can't make your mind up for you, and I've said what I came to say," he said quietly, getting to his feet. He paused at the doorway, though, turning and giving Yuki a hard look. "I still think that the chance would be worth it. Just promise me you'll look after yourself. You're always so busy doing what Father wants of you, I don't want to see you crack under the pressure. If you've found someone that makes you happy, that helps take that immense stress off your shoulders, I don't know anything else I would want more for you."

Then his brother was gone, leaving Yuki alone. The blonde sat back, staring absently up at the ceiling. Once again, he couldn't get his brother's thoughts out of his head.

'You know what it's like.'

Yuki was painfully aware that, yes, he did. Sitting here, despite his troubled thoughts, he felt the absence of the other. The silence seemed to echo louder than any of the noise Shuuichi ever made. He really was tired of being alone. He liked being able to count on the youth's presence, the strangely soothing sound of the other's voice. He'd never imagined it would be so nice, to have a warm body next to his own as he slept. Shuuichi was blunt and honest, and treated him more like a real person than anyone else ever had. It was probably what meant most to him, the fact that they had no pretenses between them. Shuuichi had seen him at his best and worst, and hadn't made a word of complaint. He hadn't spread Yuki's business through the gossip chain either, a trait which was nearly impossible to find in servant.

Yuki started when the door flew open, jerking him out of his thoughts as the subject of them entered. He was shocked to see such a miserable expression on the youth's face and, after a quick glance at the dining table, was shocked even more when Shuuichi burst into tears.

"What's going on? Are you hurt?" he exclaimed, quickly getting to his feet. The youth looked uninjured, but it was startling to see such an extreme change from Shuuichi's usually happy demeanor.

"Your dinner tray is missing! They made one for you, and it's gone now!" Shuuichi sobbed, running a hand across his wet cheeks.

"It's certainly nothing to cry about. The kitchen can easily make another," Yuki replied.

The brunette shook his head, a fresh wave of tears slipping down his cheeks. "But it's my job to make sure your food comes on time, and now you're going to have to wait for them to cook up a second meal. I came all the way over here, gave up everything I'd ever known, so that I could serve you, and I've done a horrible job of it! I can't even make sure you get a meal on time."

He'd never been good at comforting others. Tetsua was the only person he'd even tried with, and he'd always seemed to do a bad job of it. Not knowing what else to do, Yuki wrapped his arms around Shuuichi's shoulders and pulled the youth against him. Almost immediately, Shuuichi burrowed his face against Yuki's chest, crying harder.

He wasn't stupid enough to think this was really about the dinner tray. He'd thought that Shuuichi would become homesick eventually, and couldn't even imagine what the youth was feeling right now. Yuki had hardly been away from the castle for more than a few days at a time, and certainly hadn't missed it. What would it be like, to find himself thrust into the middle of a culture that was almost completely different from the one he knew?

"Don't cry," he said quietly, rubbing his hand against Shuuichi's back. He rolled his eyes at himself. That certainly wasn't going to help. "I appreciate everything that you do for me, Shuuichi. Can I do something in return, something that might help you feel better?"

The youth shook his head against Yuki's chest in reply, and all the blonde could think to do was continue to rub his back. He'd been told it was a calming sensation, but it didn't seem to be working this time. It pained him, to feel the sobs work through Shuuichi's body, to know there wasn't anything he could do to help.

Still, he continued to hold the youth close, not caring as his shirt absorbed the tears that fell from Shuuichi's eyes. After a while Shuuichi's shoulders began to shake less, the tearing cries slowly becoming quiet sniffles. Only then did Yuki drop his arms and take a step back.

Shuuichi's head followed his movements, as though his face had become stuck. "Don't," the youth said quietly, still a bit of a choked sound in his tone. "I'm so embarrassed, I don't want have to face you."

"So, are we going to walk around the rest of the day like this then?"

As he'd wanted, Yuki heard a weak laugh. "You made a joke."

Yuki brought his hands up to Shuuichi's cheeks, gently forcing the youth's head up so that they could meet eye to eye. "You don't have to be embarrassed about missing your home. You really did give up everything for this job, and it's fine by me if you need to cry," he said, softly but firmly.

"I shouldn't of let my emotions get the better of me. It was just that Samantha's words really got to me, and I realized how homesick I felt. And then the tray was missing, and it just suddenly seemed to be too much," Shuuichi babbled, his bottom lip starting to tremble once again.

"Samantha?" Yuki repeated with a frown. He recognized the name. He'd been avoiding the girl for a good three years now, after making the mistake of asking her to rub his back the first time he'd been plagued by the pain. He'd wandered down in to the gardens in hopes of loosening the muscles out, but just ended up making it worse. He'd thought she was still too young and lived a life too far separated from his own for her to confuse it for something else. That certainly hadn't been the case. She'd ended up everywhere he went, even waited outside his room at night to be able to fetch his water and breakfast, until he'd finally ordered the guards to make sure she stayed off the fourth floor.

"I don't want you listening to a word that girl tells you. You've got a home here with me, and plenty of friends around the castle. The advisors heard nothing but good things about you when they asked around. You're doing a remarkable job. I don't know what I'd do without you."

He'd never been so glad to see a smile on Shuuichi's face, and Yuki suddenly became very aware of how close they were. Now that he'd looked at them, he couldn't seem to pull his eyes away from Shuuichi's lips. Through the dampness left from Shuuichi's tears, he could feel the softness of his skin against his palms, and never more in his life had he wanted to kiss someone.

He saw the subtle change in the other's expression, the way Shuuichi's eyes flitted down to his mouth. Yuki moaned softly when he saw the youth's tongue flicker out to moisten his bottom lip, and in that moment it was just too much.

He dipped his head, covering the few inches that had remained between them, and pressed his mouth against the other's. His mouth seemed to flame at the contact, the sensation moving through his skin until his entire body burned. He'd thought about it so often, but had never imagined a simple kiss could feel this good.

Yuki felt hands slip up his shoulders, around his neck, and he deepened the kiss, tentatively slipping his tongue within the other's mouth. He felt Shuuichi's moan all the way to his spine, a shudder working through him as it pushed his need for the other even higher.

Yuki pulled away before he lost complete control of his senses, his breathing more than a little ragged. Shuuichi didn't let go of his neck, gazing up at him with heated eyes and moistened lips. It took all the control Yuki had not to give in to the temptation of taking them once again.

He took the youth's shoulder's in his hands, gently separated him. He forced his gaze away from Shuuichi's confused eyes, looking up at the torch instead. "You should go to bed. After such a day, you probably need the rest. I'll tend to my own supper, okay?"

He heard Shuuichi's confused stammer as Yuki moved around him, heading to the door, but he didn't pause until the had it firmly shut behind him. He'd run away like a coward, and he knew it. But he had no explanations to offer the youth, and certainly couldn't take the chance of his desires getting the better of him. It had been a mistake.

A glorious mistake. 


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

"We'll have to make sure that word gets around properly to ensure that everyone is sparse with their candles until the lack of wax can be made up."

"Of course. I'll assign a messenger to the task."

Yuki rolled his eyes and tried to stifle a yawn. Really, was it necessary for him to be here for these kinds of trivial things. Really, how many men did it take to decide on what to do about a wax shortage?

"The farming reports came in last night. Last week, three more sows were lost. I think we need to address this problem quickly, Sire, before it becomes even more serious. We are losing more and more livestock to the wolves and coyotes every week."

"Yes, we need to nip this in the bud, sir."

"May I suggest a hunting party? We could celebrate the new spring, while getting rid of our predator problem. It would certainly help lift everyone's spirits after that dreadful winter."

Yuki perked up at this. It had been almost a year since their last hunting party. He'd enjoyed them since childhood, the chance to get out of the castle, sleep under the stars, the thrill of tracking and finding his target. His father always made a big to-do about it, as was to be expected, but that didn't ruin the sense of freedom it gave him. During a hunting party there were no classes or meeting to sit through. He could sleep in, come and go as he pleased, and, for once, answer to no one but his own whimsy. He would still need to obey the rules as were expected of him, but they were lessened dramatically from the days when he had to be the perfect model of a human being before the many watching eyes.

"There are no pressing matters over the next few days, why don't we schedule it for two days time?" he suggested, knowing it would be torture to even have to wait that long.

His father gave him a surprised look. Not unexpected, as it was the first time Yuki had shown any real interest in the presented issues. "Well, I suppose that it's as good of time as any. We need to take care of it quickly after all," he commented before turning back to the head advisor. "Do you think we could manage that?"

"Certainly. Hunts are all pretty much the same, so everyone knows what needs to be prepared. Besides, I'm sure the excitement will outweigh the extra work. You can send the orders out today."

"And what about the plans for Tetsua's birthday?"

"The guest invitations have been sent out, sire, and preparations are well underway. Everything will be ready for next week."

"Good. Then, is there anything else to address today?"

Yuki cleared his throat, sitting up taller in his chair. "I wanted arrange a two-month clearing of our schedules for Tetsua and myself," he announced. They certainly hadn't been expecting that. It was extremely rare for anyone to take more than a few days. He waited for the surprised mutterings to wear down before he continued. "Shuuichi and Ryuuichi were taken far from their homes in order to be presented to myself and my brother. I don't think any of us could understand that kind of isolation. I don't think either of them will be able to handle the pressure forever. It is important for them to be granted even a short time to visit with the family and friends they left behind."

The blonde waited rather nervously through the silence which followed. He had no idea how his father and these stuffy men of court would react to his suggestion. It was likely that none of them had ever heard a petition such as this for an employee.

He was caught off guard when his father smiled and nodded. "Your consideration for your servant is noted, my son. It's a good thing, to be able to think beyond your own necessities. I don't think anyone else would of prepared for his likely homesickness, and I've seen the consequences that can come upon a person's spirit. From what I've heard, the two boys are serving Tetsua and yourself very well, and we certainly wouldn't want to lose such good employees."

Yuki nodded silently, not quite able to meet his fathers eyes.

"Besides," his father declared, turning toward the rest of the party who still appeared hesitant, "it would be the perfect opportunity for my boys to learn about the world. There is only so much that you can get out of a book, and I want my children to know the countries which are our allies! There is too much going on right now, of course, but I want to make sure my sons have the opportunity to travel to the east."

Suddenly, it became about Yuki's worldly knowledge, but he didn't mind. Either way, it would mean that Shuuichi would be given the opportunity to visit his home. It wouldn't be for several more months yet, but Yuki hoped that the knowledge would help perk up the youth's spirits. He didn't know how Ryuuichi was reacting to the move, he appeared perfectly happy with Tetsua, but Yuki had the feeling he would appreciate it too.

Once the date had been settled, the meeting was finally finished for the day. Yuki got out of the uncomfortable chair eagerly, but took the steps up to his chambers slowly. He knew lunch would be waiting for his hungry stomach. However, Shuuichi would be there too.

After he'd run away last night, he hadn't returned until he'd been certain that the brunette would be asleep. He just hadn't had the courage to face Shuuichi, or his own actions. He'd done something extremely stupid by kissing the youth. Come this morning, he'd tried to pretend that nothing was wrong, yet couldn't seem to think of anything to say to the youth. He knew that it would seem like he was ignoring Shuuichi, but he didn't know what else to do but pretend it hadn't happened.

The memory of it was burned into his mind. Yuki knew he wouldn't forget the sensation of the youth's mouth against his own any time soon. However, he had to make it clear that it wasn't something that could happen again. He just couldn't seem to say the words out loud.

Shuuichi sighed, staring down at the lunch tray in front of him. There was a whole assortment to choose from, three different kinds of meat and a rainbow of fruits. None of it appealed to him though.

He was depressed, and he knew it. He'd felt about a hundred times better after Yuki had let him cry on his shoulder. Or chest, rather. He'd felt comforted, secured, with those warm arms around him. Slowly, just that embrace was able to help appease his upset.

Then had come the kiss. Something so innocent, which had changed everything. Standing so close to the blond, Yuki's scent in the air, it had pulled Shuuichi away from the thoughts of his sadness and toward those of desire. When he'd seen the heat in Yuki's sapphire eyes he hadn't been able to keep his reaction from showing.

It had been spectacular. Shuuichi couldn't imagine experiencing anything else that might bring such a wave of pleasure and desire over him. He could still remember the feel of Yuki's hard body against his own, the taste of his mouth and the heat of his skin. In that moment, he'd thought that the world had reached perfection, and he'd never wanted it to end.

It had, of course, and all Shuuichi could do was watch as Yuki made his way out of the room. Despite the likely bad outcome, the brunette had tried to wait up for him. However, going from the saddest moment of life, to the happiest, then back to the saddest had taken it's toll on him and he'd fallen asleep only seconds after laying back on the couch.

The blonde hadn't said a word to him since, seeming to be grumpier than usual this morning as he stormed around the room without even sparing Shuuichi a glance. Shuuichi already knew a relationship was impossible, but it still hurt. He thought that he deserved at least a 'good morning' or something. Yuki couldn't of made it more obvious that there would never be a repeat performance.

Which was too bad, Shuuichi thought with a sigh. The kiss seemed to be all he could think about now, and he almost desperately craved another.

Still, he wouldn't let it ruin everything. Even with the underlying pain in his heart, he wanted to keep his position as Yuki's personal servant. Having what he could was better than having nothing at all, and he would do his best to put the kiss behind him and let things go back to normal. He'd work just as hard as he had been, do everything he had before. He would keep the appropriate distance and keep his desires to himself.

The blonde was taking a long time though, Shuuichi noticed with a frown. He'd been given the order to retrieve the lunch dish, and so he'd assumed that Yuki would show up. If Yuki didn't arrive soon, his food would be cold.

Maybe the prince was still avoiding him?

He nearly jumped out of his skin when the door opened. Given his thoughts, he was relieved when Yuki entered. "Hey, your food was going cold," he offered as a greeting, hoping he sounded casual.

The blonde still wouldn't look at him, but at least he took the seat across the table. "The meeting took longer than I'd thought," he explained.

"Anything interesting this time?" Shuuichi questioned. He did his best to pretend that everything was the same, grabbing a handful of grapes despite his lack of appetite.

"Several things, actually," Yuki replied, biting into a bread roll. "Tetsua's birthday celebration will be next week. And it was decided that there will be a hunting party in two days, to help lower the number of livestock we're losing to wild animals."

"What's a hunting party?" Shuuichi questioned, not recognizing the term.

"Ah, well, it's more of a big party than anything else. We round up our hunters and most of the soldiers, and head out into the woods. There's a clearing there which we always use as a camp. There's always lots of drinking and dancing and such, as well as daily trips out into the forest to hunt."

"It sounds like fun!"

"Yes, it is. Most of the time I go off on my own. It's the perfect opportunity to escape, because there isn't anything to do other than party or hunt and so no one pays that close of attention to my movements. I hope you don't mind having to trail after me, but I'm not going to waste the chance."

Shuuichi shook his head quickly. "I don't mind at all," he replied. Honestly, walking alone around the woods with Yuki sounded rather romantic.

"Also... there's something else."

Shuuichi waited, wondering at the expression on Yuki's face. If he didn't know better, he would say the man looked nervous. "Yes?" he finally prodded when the blonde continued with his silence.

"Well, it wouldn't be for a couple months, but I've arranged a trip for ourselves as well as Tetsua and Ryuuichi. To go to Japan."

Shuuichi could hardly believe his ears. "Really?"

The blonde nodded, still not looking at him. "It won't be for long, of course, because there's a lot of traveling involved and we've got duties here, but -"

Shuuichi cut him off. "It doesn't matter how long!" he exclaimed. "I don't care if it's just for one day. The fact that I'll be able to see my family again, to be able to give my mother and father a proper goodbye and do all of the things I should of done before leaving... I don't know how to thank you, Yuki. Are you sure it's all right?"

Yuki shrugged casually, leaning back in his chair. "The preparations to clear up mine and Tetsua's schedule are already being made. Father thought the idea of the two of learning more about the world first hand was a good idea. I'm not exactly sure what is going to be arranged, yet, but we'll be leaving in three months."

Unable to help himself, Shuuichi jumped to his feet and threw his arms around Yuki's shoulders. "I can't believe it, thank you so much! I don't know what else to say."

Yuki actually smiled again and Shuuichi laughed, spinning himself around in circles a few times. He was so excited, he didn't know what to do with himself! How could he of thought for even a second that Yuki didn't care about him? Whatever the reason for Yuki's reaction after the kiss, that certainly wasn't it. No one had ever done something so thoughtful for him before. He'd been given many good opportunities in life, chances to build himself up to the best he could be, but had never been given such a selfless gift.

"What about Ryuuichi, does he know?"

Yuki nodded. "Probably, by now. I let Tetsua know on my way up for lunch, so that he could tell him."

For the remainder of the meal, until Yuki had to head off to his afternoon studies, Shuuichi chatted happily about Japan. He couldn't wait to show the prince all that he'd grown up with, the food and music and customs. He doubted Yuki would be comfortable on a futon bed, but he'd make sure that Yuki enjoyed all the other experiences of his culture.

It was amazing how Yuki's announcement changed his mood. Shuuichi set about his chores with a flourish, completing even most of the ones he was to do tomorrow. After scrubbing down the stones of the bathtub his knees were nearly raw, but he hardly cared as he immediately set about changing the draperies and linens. By the time he retrieved the evening dish, he was so exhausted that he collapsed on the couch without separating a plate. His stomach was growling, but he was spent. Now he realized why only a certain amount of chores were allotted each day!

He'd almost fallen asleep when Yuki returned, and Shuuichi forced himself up with a groan. "Can I get you anything?" he questioned, trying to disguise the pain in his joints from the over-exertion.

Apparently, he wasn't fooling anyone. Yuki looked at him with raised brows. "You managed to get most of tomorrow's chores done too, in just six hours?"

Shuuichi grinned sheepishly, falling back against the couch. He hadn't thought that Yuki would really notice all of the cleaning. It was part of his job to do such things discretely, so that the master wouldn't be able to notice the changes. "I was still so excited, I had all of this extra energy that I just couldn't sit still."

"Well, it's a good thing after all. With the hunt coming up, we'll be gone for two days, and you won't have to scramble like the other's to keep up," Yuki pointed out as he separated his plate.

"You must be excited about the hunt. The way you described it, it sounds like you've been looking forward to it for weeks. It must be great, finally being given the chance for some freedom from your duties," Shuuichi commented.

Yuki nodded, taking his seat. "Yes, it's a rare thing. Aren't you going to eat?"

"I can't seem to move at the moment," Shuuichi replied with a laugh. It was true, the pain was reduced to a dull ache when he laid down. He didn't relish having to get back up again.

Yuki frowned at him. "Did you really work yourself so ragged?"

The brunette quickly shook his head, regretting is comment. "I'm fine, really. I'm just not hungry at the moment."

Yuki continued to frown as he got to his feet. Shuuichi watched curiously as the blonde made his way to the dinner table, realizing too late that the prince was actually separating a plate for him and pouring their drinks. "Oh! You shouldn't be doing that!" he exclaimed, once again forcing himself to sit upright. He was too late, though, Yuki was already heading toward him.

"Just take it. I'm not an invalid nor a cad, you know. I can do something for you once and a while. It makes no sense that I should force you to continue waiting on me, when you've already worked yourself to exhaustion," the blonde stated sharply, holding out the plate and goblet.

"Um... thank you," Shuuichi replied, taking the offered items. It felt strange, to be handed a meal as though he were the one to be waited on.

Yuki didn't say anything. He simply returned to his chair and picked up his meal once again.

The two of them ate in silence. For one of the first times in his life, Shuuichi had no idea what to talk about, and so he kept his mouth shut. It wasn't an uncomfortable silence, though, and he was glad for that. It was nice, he realized, not to have to feel like he had to fill up the quiet. He had never felt comfortable enough before, with anyone. It was an automatic reflex to feel as though he had to be entertaining the other person somehow, even if the topic were as inane as the weather.

When they had finished with their meals, Shuuichi pushed himself up to his feet and collected the dishes before Yuki could. How bad would it look if Yuki insisted on returning them himself? The brunette made certain his expression remained calm, despite his clenched teeth, as he moved around.

"Are you feeling better now?" Yuki asked him, examining his face closely.

Shuuichi forced a smile. "Yes, much better after the rest," he replied cheerfully.

"It was only a few moments though," the blonde pointed out.

Shuuichi shook his head. "Don't worry, I'm fine."

Even so, it took him nearly twice as long to make his way to the kitchens and back. The brunette chided himself fiercely at making such a stupid mistake. He hadn't stopped to think about the limitations of his body. His knees especially were still feeling the hardness of the stone tiles. On an average day, he was tired enough to retire not long after the evening meal. He should of realized it would be too much.

He'd only just reentered the room when he suddenly felt himself pulled off his feet. Too shocked to do anything else, Shuuichi hung in Yuki's arms as the blonde brought him into the next room and deposited him onto the lush bed.

"Don't think you can lie to me," the blonde said harshly, giving him a hard look that killed any words that Shuuichi might of thought of speaking. "What the hell were you thinking, working yourself so hard that you can barely walk?"

"I was just-"

"You got carried away, I know," Yuki interrupted. "But you're no use to me if you can barely hold up an empty tray without wincing."

Shuuichi looked away, stung. He started slightly when he felt Yuki's hands wrap around his ankle, his eyes shooting up to meet the other's. "What are you doing?" he stammered.

"You may be my servant, Shuuichi, but you're still a human being. If I can require of you to massage away my pains when I'm in a similar condition, what reason is there for me not to return the favor?" the blond said quietly, the sharpness gone from his face and tone as he worked his fingers gently over the sore joint.

"Because you're my master!" Shuuichi replied, trying to ignore the soothing caresses Yuki was administering. Even through his clothes, his skin began to tingle at the contact. "It's improper!"

Yuki met his eyes steadily. "And who here is going to care?" he questioned softly. "I thought we had worked past all of that formality garbage. We... friends do these kind of things for each other. Now, are you going to keep protesting, or are you going to turn over and let me help you properly?"

Shuuichi snapped his mouth shut and let his head fall back against the pillow, rolling himself over. He certainly didn't want Yuki to stop, so why was he making such a fuss about it? It was just a massage, a trivial matter that, while not announced around, occurred often enough. A silent gesture of the deepest friendship with the trust it would take for one to allow the hands of another to touch so intimately.

Yuki thought of him as that kind of friend. It was more than he could of hoped, after all the mistakes he'd made over the last few days. The air had been so charged between them since the kiss, he'd half expected the blonde fire him.

Something in it didn't ring true, though. Shuuichi didn't feel like he was being touched by a friend. The fire trails which followed the path of Yuki's fingers over his calves and ankles in fact felt very far from friendship. If every massage felt this good, how could it not mean anything more? How could anything that felt this arousing be considered a casual contact?

He closed his eyes, resisting the temptation to moan as Yuki's ministrations moved up to the muscles of his thighs. The blonde's hands were firm, but gentle enough to make his motions painless as he pressed his fingertips into Shuuichi's tense muscles, slowly working the tendons loose.

Up over his buttox, into the knot that made the small of his back. With every movement, his muscles lost their pain, but a different kind of tension came over his body.

It was how he'd imagined the touch of a lover...

Shuuichi closed his eyes tight, his breath catching in his throat. He wanted to turn over to face the figure presently arched over him, bring his hands up into those golden locks, and pull him down until their lips meet. He wanted to feel Yuki's hands over his chest, over every part of his body that burned for the contact. He wanted to hear the other moan his name and see the heated passion in his eyes. He wanted to feel Yuki's body pressed against his own as they moved together, fueled to completion by their shared desire.

This had been a bad idea. 


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

Shuuichi double-checked each bag before beginning the track down to the courtyard where the horses were waiting. It was the morning that they would be leaving for the hunt, and he wanted to make sure that he'd remembered everything Yuki would need for the three days they would be out in the woods. Clothes, toiletries, something to read. And the most important thing of all, Yuki's hunting gear.

Luckily, other supplies were taken care of by others. Torches, tents and bedding, food and water, and all else that would be needed over the next three days were taken care of by other servants as they were packed into small carriages. Shuuichi only had to handle Yuki's personal items, although he'd been required to pack a picnic lunch in case Yuki were to become hungry along the way.

The whole castle was bustling with activity. Half the kitchen would be coming along, so that meals could be prepared and served while warm. There would be musicians and entertainers, people to serve drinks and food, stable hands to care for the horses, as well as a good fifty men who would be participating in the hunt. The number was brought up to nearly seventy with those whom were high enough in status to have their own assistants.

Even those whom were not coming along were excited, eager for the stories which the party would return with. Shuuichi had never seen the castle in such a uproar, people running around with their tasks, stopping to chat and laugh every other minute. The sound of voices seemed to echo through every hallway of the palace.

Despite the seeming confusion, everything was ready to go only a few hours after breakfast. Shuuichi could only imagine the spectacle they made as they were lead by the kind toward the forest. The princes came next, followed by their respective servants, leading a seemingly endless trail of horses and carriages.

The excitement was contagious, and Shuuichi chattered happily with Ryuuichi as they followed after their masters. No one paid them the least bit of attention, but they spoke in Japanese anyway as Shuuichi stammered and blushed his way through the tail of his kiss with Yuki, and the massage the next night. He was doubly glad that no one could understand him, because he had been nearly over-boiled with excitement to tell his friend about his romantic good fortune.

"I don't think it's as impossible as you thought," Ryuuichi teased him.

Shuuichi knew he was grinning like an idiot but he couldn't seem to stop himself. "I thought everything was ruined when we kissed. But he wouldn't of touched me if he didn't want to, right?"

"Of course not! I think he's just as in love with you as you are with him!"

Shuuichi shook his head. "That's just because you've found love with Tetsua. I'm not foolish enough to think that it could mean something that big."

"But he desires you at least. That's a start. It's not hard for desire to turn into love, Shuuichi, and you shouldn't underestimate your own appeal. Tetsua told me that he'd never seen his brother act like this before."

"Act like what?" Shuuichi couldn't keep himself from asking.

Ryuuichi grinned at him and leaned close despite the fact no one would be able to understand. "He told me that Yuki is acting differently because of you. That day we met in the gardens, it was the first time in years that Yuki had been there. Tetsua doesn't think it was a coincidence that Yuki brought you there. Like it was a romantic walk or something."

Shuuichi flushed. "It wasn't anything like that. Yuki hadn't even kissed me yet on that day."

"So? Do you think that him kissing you is the only thing that shows how he feels? Tetsua said that he'd never seen his brother so happy. It doesn't show on his face, but he could still tell. He said his brother looked more relaxed than he'd ever seen before, and he was even smiling on occasion. Apparently, he hasn't seen his brother smile since the stress of the coronation was handed to him."

"Really?" Shuuichi asked, still disbelieving. He stored those little facts away, feeling his heart beat a little quicker which each thing Ryuuichi revealed to him.

His friend nodded, looking delighted. "Did you know that Prince Yuki has always refused the offer of a personal assistant before? Tetsua said that he was so extremely private with his life that he wouldn't allow anyone to stay more than a short while in his chambers. He could never stand someone's presence for more than that, he liked to be alone so much."

Shuuichi cast a glance over to his prince. Yuki and Tetsua were talking, a serious conversation by the expression's on their faces. It had been more of a sacrifice than he'd first assumed for Yuki to give up so much of his privacy. What did the man think, when he entered the chambers to find Shuuichi there? Did he find it annoying that he so rarely had his own quarters to himself? Did he feel invaded, as though he couldn't get even a moment alone?

Well, he would of said something, wouldn't he? Yuki was a plain-spoken man. If he had wanted Shuuichi to leave, he would of just told him to get lost for a while.

Unless he was too polite for that kind of thing, which was entirely possible as Shuuichi didn't really have any other place to go if Yuki kicked him out. Yuki might have the habit of speaking harshly, but he would never do anything he felt was unfair.

Shuuichi didn't like the thought that he might of been an annoyance, having never thought on his own that he should give the prince some of his own space once and a while. After all, Shuuichi could of gone out for walks more often, instead of staying in to read a book or chat idly.

A sudden thought occurred to him, and Shuuichi felt his stomach drop. What if Yuki's attraction was only because of their close proximity? Shuuichi knew it was easy to become infatuated with someone you saw every day. The intimacy forced upon a person when sharing a bathroom, a bedroom, it could be mistaken as a different kind of intimacy after a while. If Shuuichi had been given separate quarters, would any of this have happened?

He knew his own feelings wouldn't of been different, but he found it so difficult to figure out what Yuki was thinking. One minute, the guy would be ignoring him, then would suddenly bring up a topic of conversation. Times when he thought the blonde would be angry, it turned out he wasn't. He honestly hadn't had the slightest clue that Yuki might of been attracted to him, until the kiss, but even now he still couldn't tell for sure.

It could of been a fluke, a consequence of the situation. They'd been standing so close to each other, and the moment had seemed so intensely personal. Perhaps it had just been some kind of slip, and Yuki didn't actually feel that way about him at all.

But then there was the fact of the massage. Shuuichi knew for a fact that Yuki didn't like touching people, or being touched himself unless it was necessary. He'd never once seen the man hug someone else, not even his brother, muchless do something that was so much more intimate as he'd done with Shuuichi. How could the massage not mean something?

In the end, he pushed the thoughts to the side and changed the subject with his friend toward their upcoming visit to Japan. He would just drive himself crazy with all of this speculation. The truth of the matter was that he couldn't do anything about it. The ball was in Yuki's court, and wherever their relationship went was up to him. Shuuichi would just have to accept whatever the outcome came to be.

It didn't take as long as he'd thought for them to reach the clearing that Yuki had mentioned. It wasn't really a clearing, it was more of a bend in the edge of the forest itself, reaching out into a large plain. He shouldn't of been surprised though. They would need most of this room to set up all of the tents that had been brought along.

Shuuichi followed Yuki off to the side, where they joined the other nobility who were sitting down to eat their lunch. He felt out of place, despite the other personal assistants who were here as well, because the remaining servants went about setting up the tents. It didn't seem fair for him to just sit here and eat, but Yuki didn't give him any other instructions.

He watched with interest as the camp grew quickly, a make-shift kitchen set up in two of them, hunting gear placed in another, making sure he noted which ones were separated off as private toiletry tents. A lot of them were left open on the sides, those which would be used only for getting out of the sun or rain, or for setting up chairs during meals and the drinking parties Yuki had described.

"Afterward," Yuki commented, gaining his attention. "It's better to stay out of their way during all of this major stuff. Once all of the initial set up has been complete, then you'll go about taking care of my things. We'll select a spot for my personal tent and tend to unpacking my hunting gear and the like. We can keep our horses with the others for the stable hands to take care of until we need them again."

Not wanting to feel useless compared to all of these other people, Shuuichi jumped at the chance when it came time for him to get to work. He unpacked the horses first so that they could be tended to, setting the bags next to the area that Yuki had chosen. With the help of a few others, he had the medium sized tent up rather quickly. Although Yuki had commented that he'd probably sleep outside, he still needed to set up a bed and organize the prince's belongings.

It was then that Shuuichi realized one of the bags was missing. He double checked inside the tent and around the area outside, but it was nowhere in sight. A glance around showed him that Yuki had broken away from the rest of the group and was reading under the shade of the tree, without anything other than himself and the book.

Yuki's hunting gear was gone! He was certain that he'd packed it, he'd checked a second time to make sure!

Frantically, the youth went around the camp, checking every bag that that wasn't unpacked or in the process of being unpacked. He went around to every person he could see, checking the supplies they were carrying around. As a prince, Yuki's weapons had been made especially for him, and so they were unique. No one seemed to of picked them up by accident.

It must of been lost on the way. Shuuichi could of sworn that he'd fastened everything securely, and it seemed odd that no one would of noticed if the bag had fallen to the ground while they were traveling, but there was no other explanation. He'd have to go back and find it.

As he made his way over to the blonde, Shuuichi mentally recited what he would say. If he could help it, he didn't want Yuki to know he'd made such a huge error. Never mind what everyone else would think, Shuuichi didn't want to see the disappointment in those ocean-blue eyes. Hunting was the whole reason for the trip, and to think that he'd lost the most important items for it. On top of that, he could just imagine how expensive the weapons had been!

"Hey," he offered as a greeting, forcing a smile to his lips. "I finished setting up your things, so the tent is ready if you want to use it. Also, if you wouldn't mind, all of the noise is giving me a headache. Could I go for a short walk before dinner?"

Yuki closed his book, getting to his feet. "Why don't I join you? The noise is a bit much for me too."

"Um... sure," Shuuichi answered reluctantly. He couldn't think of a reason to give the other as to why he should refuse the company. Especially since it was he that was supposed to accompany Yuki in the first place. "Do you mind if we follow the pathway, though? I'm a little tired from all the work this morning."

Yuki gave him an appraising look, but didn't protest. He lead the way back to the path, tucking his book into his belt loop. "Do you think you'll be feeling better tomorrow? I was planning on heading out after breakfast."

"Oh, no problem. It doesn't take me long to rebuild my energy. I'm sure I'll be ready to go after our walk, if you want."

It was then that Shuuichi realized he had no choice but to tell Yuki about the disappearance of his weapons whether they found them or not. Yuki would obviously notice if they happened to find the bag sitting on the pathway. And if they didn't, then he'd have to confess to losing them. There was no way that they could cover the whole distance back to the castle on foot within the hours before supper, and it would be pointless to try.

Well, at least he wouldn't be overheard. They were easily out of earshot for anyone at the noisy camp site. He could avoid that embarrassment at least.

"I have to tell you something," he started reluctantly. "I was certain that I'd packed your hunting gear. But I couldn't find the bag while I was setting up your things. I searched all over. It must of gotten lost along the way or something."

"Oh, that's fine. I can just borrow Tetsua's, or from the extra supplies," Yuki replied with a casual shrug of his shoulders.

Shuuichi blinked. "Extra supplies?" he echoed.

"Yeah, they always bring extra bows and swords along. Not everyone has the money to be able to afford their own. Besides, you never know when your bow string might snap from over use until it actually happens."

Shuuichi couldn't help a little laugh, feeling the weight disappear from his shoulders. "So, you're not mad?"

Yuki cast him a look. "Why would I be? I get a new set every birthday anyway."

"Every birthday? Man, I almost went crazy with worry over nothing!" Shuuichi exclaimed, laughing outright this time. Yuki dismissed it so casually, and he'd been imagining getting yelled and laughed at!

"Have you ever gone hunting?" Yuki questioned once Shuuichi had quieted down once again.

The brunette shook his head. "I've heard a lot of stories about it, but haven't actually done it myself. It's not exactly in the job description."

"Do you want me to teach you? I don't plan on going out with the hunting parties, so we actually have the time if you want."

Shuuichi was surprised and pleased by Yuki's offer. It took him only a moment to agree. He had the feeling he would be laughably unskilled, but that didn't mean he wasn't going to enjoy every minute of it! Unable to help himself, Shuuichi imagined the two of them walking through the shelter of the trees, the only sounds those of the birds and their footsteps, sharing the quiet company of each other as though they were the only two people on the face of the Earth.

Shuuichi couldn't stop a shiver from going down his spine. He couldn't wait until tomorrow. 


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Yuki ran his eyes over Shuuichi's sleeping features, sighing softly. One could commented on how innocent a sleeping face looked, but Shuuichi's always held a certain innocence. Instead, he would describe it as calm. Shuuichi was always in the midst of some emotion, happiness or sadness, excitement or contentment. It was odd to see a simple expression of peace.

Within the tent they had their own separate sleeping mats, but space had them next to each other. The short distance seemed too close, yet too far away at the same time. It would take next to nothing for him to side up next to the other and pull Shuuichi's warm form against his own.

Yet he couldn't, and that fact tortured him.

He could still remember the feel of the youth's body under his hands from days ago, the lean muscles, the subtle dips, the smooth curve of Shuuichi's spine. He hadn't touched more than the boy's back or legs, but it had almost felt like they were making love. It would of taken just a slight sift of his body, a slight change in the position of his hands, and his actions would of become something far different from a simple massage. It had taken every ounce of his willpower not to lean down and press his lips against the bared curve of Shuuichi's neck.

Even now his eyes trailed over it, the gentle pulse he could see throbbing there, and again it almost became too much. He wanted to taste the line of Shuuichi's jaw, see if the flesh below was as sensitive as it appeared. He wanted to claim those lips a second time, and brand the youth his own in an entirely personal way.

He should of thought ahead of his actions. Three times now, he'd made that mistake. He had promised the youth to teach him to hunt. At the time, it had seemed like a perfectly innocent branch in the conversation.

But to place his body up against the other's, to guide Shuuichi's hands with his own and hold their cheeks together to show him aim... It would be a sweet torture. Slowly, Yuki was losing control of his thoughts and actions. He would have to try harder than ever to keep his hands and eyes from wandering. His irrational mind seemed to make it easier every time he got a little bit closer, allowed more and more faults in his behavior. Too often, he was able to think up an excuse for his actions, as though there could be a real reason for letting his eyes trail along the line Shuuichi's lips.

A moan brought him out of his thoughts, and Yuki's lips quirked as Shuuichi sprawled himself out over even more space. His blanket was tangled up around his right leg and over his waist, the rest of him stretched out and half off his mat.

Yuki caught the hand that swung by his face, intent on returning it to the area of Shuuichi's own bed, but found he couldn't release it. Shuuichi's palm was warm against his own, his fingers instinctively curling around Yuki's own. The blonde stared at their joined hands for a long moment, feeling something shift inside of him until he was almost reduced to tears from the contact.

He didn't know exactly what it was, didn't want to put a name to it, but the fact remained the same that he fell asleep holding Shuuichi's hand.

"When are you going to put that poor kid out of his misery?"

Yuki looked up from his breakfast as Tetsua plopped down beside him, his expression actually serious. The blonde stole a glance over at Shuuichi, but the youth was caught up in another non-English conversation with his friend. He was beginning to dislike Japanese, his curiosity getting the better of him with wanting to know what the youth was talking about.

"Yes, I'm talking about him," Tetsua declared, calling Yuki's attention back.

"Don't say such things so loudly," Yuki chided, despite the fact that the two servants were the only two even remotely close to them. Everyone had learned long ago that if Yuki wanted company, he would seek it out himself. Except for his brother, of course.

Tetsua rolled his eyes. "Please, as if anyone can't tell he's got a thing for you. He follows you around like a lost dog."

Yuki snorted at his brother's words. "He's supposed to."

Tetsua grinned. "Yes, I suppose so. But you just have to look at his face to be able to see it. He doesn't hide his emotions nearly as well as you do, Yuki. The fact that he's in love with you is as plain as day. After watching the two of you at supper last night, I think even Father has noticed."

This got his attention. "You're not serious?" he exclaimed.  
"I wouldn't worry about it too much. Half the court is in love with you. The other half is in love with me. And all of it is in love with Father. It comes with the money. He'll probably shrug it off as admiration and forget all about it once we get back. As long as you keep it discrete when you finally cave in."

"Sometimes, I really hate you."

Tetsua grinned at him. "Hey, one of us has to say the obvious. It's only a matter of time, my brother. These 'exotic gifts of the East' have a way of wearing down your reservations."

Yuki snorted. "As if you had any reservations about it. I bet the two of you jumped in the sack the first night he was here."

"I've decided to disregard that comment," Tetsua stated, despite the fact his face flamed red.

He hadn't actually expected to be right! Yuki stared at his brother as the younger man tried to bluff away the blush by coughing. Tetsua had always been far more open with his emotions than Yuki ever had, but he hadn't expected anything quite this impetuous from his brother. How could anyone do something so recklessly, on the whim of the heart?

Tetsua looked so happy... He and Ryuuichi kept the necessary distance as was appropriate in public. Even so, he could see the subtleties of their relationship, little details as to how they behaved around each other that everyone else seemed to miss. The soft looks they would cast each other every once and a while, they way one or the other's hand would linger when they touched, the way both seemed to get complete satisfaction out of the other's company even when they were just sitting next to each other without saying a word.

"I saw the two of you wander off yesterday," Tetsua commented, probably more to change the subject than anything else. "Heading off for a little romantic walk in the woods? Perhaps a little alone time, just the two of you and the sound of the birds? On a day like this, you could have your way with him for hours in the forest, without anyone even noticing you're gone. Wouldn't it be nice?"

"You," Yuki replied sharply, "are a pervert. And I don't have to listen to this."

"Hey, I'm just offering up a few suggestions for you," Tetsua said, bringing his hands up in a defensive position as if he hadn't been the one to bring up the topic.

"Well, I don't need your suggestions. You may think that you can do whatever you like when the thought comes to you, but I'm not in that position. I have responsibilities that you could never understand, and I can't just take on any desire which comes over me."

Tetsua gave him a frustrated look. "Are you still spewing that crap?" he snapped. Yuki was visibly shocked at his words, but his brother didn't give him a chance to reply. "I don't buy it for a second that you really believe all of that. You know full well that what you do in private is your business, and no one else's. If it's what your heart wants, what is there really to stop you? Almost every king of the past has had a lover as well as a wife, and you know full well that some of those have been men. What makes you think it's so different for you?"

"Because I can't do something like that to the person I love," Yuki snapped. "How do you think he would feel, having me go off and lay with some woman after we've made such a commitment to each other? I could never betray him like that, and so it's best just to make sure the commitment is never there."

His brother studied his face, no doubt realizing even as Yuki did that he'd used the word 'love'. "Are you listening to yourself?" Tetsua asked him softly. "How can you just put those emotions aside and pretend they don't exist? How can you just ignore what your heart is telling you? Do you really think it's just going to go away? Why are you going to deny yourself the chance to be happy, Yuki? You've sacrificed so much for this court and for father. Isn't it about time you did something for yourself? Especially something as important as this?"

The blonde could only shake his head in frustration, trying to deny Tetsua's words.

"Look at him, Yuki."

Unwillingly, his eyes trailed up to the youth. Shuuichi's smile was brilliant as he laughed over something Ryuuichi was saying. He looked so happy, innocent, and endlessly desirable.

"What do you have to lose, except Shuuichi himself?" 


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

'What do you have to lose, except Shuuichi himself?'

Yuki looked down at the youth that walked beside him, going on about something that Yuki hadn't actually heard a word of for the last five minutes. He'd been too caught up in his thoughts of the conversation he'd had with his brother just that morning.

Tetsua had forced him to look past the pretenses he'd created for himself. He really was in love with the young man beside him. He didn't know when exactly it had happened, but the thought of losing Shuuichi scared him beyond words. How could he face another day without Shuuichi at his side, making him smile, keeping him from being alone.

When it came down to it, there was no one who could stop him from having a relationship with Shuuichi, except for his father. If he kept his silence until the day of his ascention to the throne, then there would be nothing that could stand in the way of the love between them. Now that he wasn't making excuse for himself, he knew that there was no law which forced him to produce an heir. It was something expected of him, but for once, it was an expectation he did not want to live up to.

He wanted Shuuichi, plain and simple. He wanted to wake up every morning with the young man laying in his arms. He wanted to go to sleep every night with the knowledge that he wouldn't have to sleep alone. He wanted the freedom to be able to take the youth into his arms whenever he wanted, and kiss Shuuichi until both of them were senseless.

So what was stopping him, other than his own insecurities?

Yuki stopped walking, watching as Shuuichi went a few paces before realizing and stopped as well. "What's wrong?" the youth questioned, turning to him.

In that moment, Yuki swept him into his arms, and fastened his mouth against Shuuichi's in a heated kiss.

The rest of this has been edited for content, to remain with rule of no NC - 17 content. For the unedited chapter, please go to my webpage. For those of you who prefer this version, know that they did go all the way and, afterward, Yuki puts his head on Shuuichi's shoulder and cries. Then the chapter ends. 


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

Well, everything was to being perfectly normal, unfortunately.

Shuuichi sighed as he stripped the linens from Yuki's bed, a bed that he hadn't slept in even once in the week that they'd been back from the hunting trip. Yuki was treating him the same as he'd always done, kind and considerate, grumpy first thing in the morning, talking idly about the days events over supper.

Shuuichi couldn't of been more confused.

Yuki hadn't said one word about the day in the woods. Nor had he explained why he'd cried afterward. He didn't seem to be angry about it, he hadn't show any sign of being uncomfortable around Shuuichi now.

It was as though it hadn't happened at all, and the brunette was at a complete loss with what to do. He was too chicken to broach the subject himself.

It had happened so suddenly, maybe Yuki didn't know what to do either. Shuuichi certainly wasn't about to complain, but he couldn't think of what had suddenly changed in Yuki that he would go from regretful kisses to full-blown passionate love making.

The blonde was an enigma in an enigma, as they said, and nothing had ever been truer.

In the end, Shuuichi knew that he was once again waiting for a cue from the other. Yuki had made them lovers, and it would Yuki that kept them lovers. What other choice did Shuuichi have but to wait and see where the blonde took them next?

Despite his troubled thoughts, Shuuichi greeted the kitchen staff cheerfully as he retrieved Yuki's tray from it's usual waiting spot. Maria, the head staffer, had promised to keep an eye out to make sure it wasn't taken by mistake again. It was odd though, she'd told him, because they hadn't had an error like that in a long time.

Shuuichi frowned as the memory came back to him. He knew Yuki had dismissed it as a mistake, but something was nagging at Shuuichi. Especially since, upon returning from the hunt, he'd discovered Yuki's weapons exactly where they were supposed to be inside of the storage closet. He hadn't mentioned anything, but he knew for a fact that he had packed them. Unless weapons knew how to teleport themselves, someone had moved them.

Someone was trying to make him look bad in front of Yuki, and it didn't take three guesses to figure out who. Shuuichi made a mental note to keep an eye out for Samantha, and try to catch her red handed next time so that he'd actually have evidence of her actions.

Yuki had arrived from his afternoon studies when Shuuichi returned to the room, and the brunette smiled widely despite the effort it took not to just run up to Yuki and kiss him.

"How did your history class go?" Shuuichi questioned as they took their seats.

Yuki shrugged. "Same as always. It's a good thing, really, but the history of this country is rather boring." He bit into his chicken, then suddenly doubled over coughing.

Shuuichi jumped to his feet, quickly making his way over. "Are you all right? Are you choking?" he asked worriedly.

The blonde shook his head, taking a sip of his wine between coughs until they finally stopped. "The food is spicy. I wasn't expecting it," he explained, putting his plate off to the side. "You must of grabbed Tetsua's plate by mistake. He likes a lot of spices on his food."

Shuuichi frowned, thinking back. No, he'd taken the platter in Yuki's spot, and he was sure of it. Either the kitchen had made an unlikely error, or Samantha had gotten in there and switched the trays without anyone noticing.

"I'm sorry," Shuuichi said quietly, knowing he couldn't point fingers without proof.

Yuki gave him a small smile. "No problem, it's not a big deal. Why don't you bring this over to him? If he's gotten my tray, he must be complaining at the bland flavor."

Shuuichi did so, Ryuuichi greeting him happily when he opened the door. "Are you going to have supper with us?" he asked.

"Sorry, not tonight. I just came to bring Tetsua's plate. It was mixed up with Yuki's."

Ryuuichi took the platter, motioning for Shuuichi to follow him into the room. "I was wondering why our food tasted so different today. It was still good, but both Tetsua and I prefer spicy food."

"We didn't take too much of it. I didn't even have a chance to try anything before we realized the mistake," Shuuichi offered, waving at Tetsua.

His hand froze in place when he saw the alarmed look on the prince's face. "Yuki didn't eat any of this, did he?" Tetsua questioned, his lips pressed tight.

Shuuichi felt tension slip into his shoulders. "He had a bite of the chicken, that's all."

Tetsua stepped forward, gripping Shuuichi's shoulders in a hard grip. "Go back and check on him. Make sure he's all right," he said insistently.

"What's wrong?" Ryuuichi asked, sounding just as worried as Shuuichi felt.

"Yuki is severely allergic to pepper."

The castle was in an uproar, and the king was furious, the knowledge of Yuki's illness spreading around like wildfire after the doctor was called. The switching of the plates was taken as an attempt at Yuki's life. The prince had nearly died when he was a child, the first time they had put pepper onto his food before they knew of the allergy, and so the kitchen staff would never of made such a mistake as placing the tray in the wrong spot. All of them held the same items, making it nearly impossible to tell which one didn't hold the pepper, and so Yuki's tray had been placed at the edge of the counter since he was six.

Maria had slacked any heat that might of been aimed at Shuuichi. She had been watching the trays, except for a moment when she'd gone to the cellar to get the wine, and had seen him take the tray in Yuki's spot. It had to of been someone else, waiting for the exact moment when the supervisor was gone, who had done the disastrous deed.

Yuki had tried to pretend that the one bite he'd taken hadn't affected him when Shuuichi had come bursting into the room, demanding to know how he was. At first, the blonde had looked perfectly fine, and so Shuuichi could only sit back and try to pretend that he wasn't worried sick.

However, as the time to go to bed drew closer, he could hear Yuki's breathing became more ragged and the small spots of a rash began to appear over his neck and hands. Shuuichi had nearly had a heart attack when Yuki passed out in his chair. He was so much of a nervous wreck that he couldn't of been any use, even if he did have a clue as to what to do. Shuuichi didn't think he'd ever been so terrified.

Thankfully, Tetsua had shown up just a moment later with the doctor, whom had to be retrieved from town. Together, they'd been able to move Yuki into his bed, the doctor immediately setting about examining Yuki's eyes, mouth, throat, and skin. It seemed unbelievable when the man had announced that Yuki would be fine, his situation wasn't a dangerous one, and that once the initial reaction wore off it would be as though Yuki had simply caught a cold and would recover within a few days.

Despite the doctor's sureness, Shuuichi hadn't been able to sleep a wink that night. He kept a cool cloth on Yuki's forehead, his ears caught on every single shallow breathe in fear that they might faulter. The doctor had said that Yuki was getting plenty of air, despite the rough sound, but Shuuichi knew he wouldn't rest easy until he knew the blonde was breathing normally once again.

As morning became closer, Yuki's breathing finally began to even out. After checking the blonde's forehead for the fever, finding the skin cool, only then did Shuuichi finally let himself relax enough to rest. Even so, he laid himself down next to the blonde, not willing to move all the way across the room where he might not notice when Yuki woke up. He waited anxiously despite how tired he was, unable to close his eyes until he saw the blonde open his own.

He forgot about breakfast entirely until a knock sounded on the door and Lucy, one of the kitchen staff, came in with a platter. "We knew that you were probably tending to Prince Yuki, so Maria sent me up with some food for you. There's some broth here for Prince Yuki as well. How is he?"

"Better now, although he's still asleep. I'm sure he'll appreciate the soup when he wakes up," Shuuichi replied. Normally he wouldn't tell Yuki's business, but he knew that everyone must be worried.

Lucy visibly relaxed at his words. "Well, if it gets cold before he wakes up, come down to get a fresh bowl. We have some brewed all the time, for basting and such, so he can eat whenever he's feeling up to it."

Shuuichi thanked her, but the young woman hesitated at the door. "I thought I should let you know, they found out who did it," she stated. "It didn't take very long for the word to get around, and a girl from the gardens broke down into tears when she heard. She confessed to everything, including some things she'd done before to try and make you look like a bad assistant. Apparently, she hadn't known that Yuki was allergic to pepper. Still, she's been arrested for it. The king is furious, whether she knew or not."

He certainly didn't feel bad for Samantha, Shuuichi thought as he made his way back into the bedroom. He settled himself back into the chair he'd set beside Yuki's bed, nibbling on the fruit Lucy had brought him. He watched Yuki carefully, still a little wound up despite the peaceful look on the blonde's face.

Gods, what if Yuki hadn't noticed the flavor? What if Tetsua had liked only a slight spice instead of a strong one, and Yuki had eaten the whole plate of food? It stabbed at him, the knowledge that just a few more bites could of meant the difference between life and death.

Shuuichi shuddered at the thought, losing his appetite immediately. He put the tray to the side, slipping into the bed next to the blonde again. He felt like crying, whether it was happiness that Yuki was all right or sadness over what could of been, he didn't know. But he did know that, if Yuki had died, Shuuichi's heart and soul would of died with him. He would of never recovered from the loss of the man who had come to mean more to him than anything else.

Closing his eyes against the sting of tears, Shuuichi let himself bury his face against the dip of Yuki's shoulder. He slipped his arm along the man's chest, clinging almost desperately to Yuki's form as though he may suddenly vanish into nothing.

"Please, don't ever leave me," he whispered, feeling a tear slip down his cheek despite his efforts. "I love you too much to be able to take it. Please..." 


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

It was the itch that finally roused him. An almost painfully insistent itch that seemed to cover the surface of his entire body. Yuki groaned and clenched his eyes shut tightly, trying to will himself back into sleep. He couldn't think as to why he would be so itchy, but it certainly wasn't how he wanted to start a day!

Slowly, the memory came back to him as he noticed the dryness of his throat and the slightly burning sensation in his eyes.

Someone had put pepper in his meal. He didn't think for a second that Shuuichi had taken the wrong tray, or the kitchen would make such an error as to place spice on his food.

When he'd realized, he'd hoped that he hadn't eaten enough to cause a reaction, that he might of been able to smooth over the error so that Shuuichi wouldn't blame himself. The brunette was very good at taking the blame for things that weren't his fault. Such as the loss of the weapons during the hunting trip. Yuki had seen them in the closet upon their return, and he knew full well that someone had to of moved them after Shuuichi'd packed them.

Stupidly, Yuki had thought he could ignore the burning sensation in his throat and eyes, and that it would just go away if he pretended it wasn't there. Having been so young the first time, Yuki hadn't actually had any memory of exactly how allergic he was. It had just been a given fact that he couldn't have spice on his food, no bid deal.

The last thing he remembered was sitting in his chair when spots had started to dance before his eyes, followed by nothing else until this moment.

Yuki gave himself a mental once-over. There was the itch, no doubt from some kind of rash, as well as a headache, the slight burning sensation, and a stomach that felt queasy. He was also quite tired, but fine otherwise. Certainly nothing that was life-endangering, which was a big relief.

As he became aware of it, Yuki looked down at the figure pressed against him. Shuuichi was using his chest as a pillow, his brow furrowed with worry even in his sleep. Ignoring the weakness in his muscles, Yuki reached up and gently ran his thumb against Shuuichi's brow, trying to smooth out the wrinkle that couldn't look more out of place on the youth's face.

How had he managed to go all of this time since that day without touching Shuuichi even once? Every moment had been like torture, and even just the slight touch of his fingertip against Shuuichi's forehead eased that pain. How had he possibly been able to sleep for even a moment without the feel of Shuuichi's form keeping him warm?

It was because of what had happened afterward, Yuki knew. The moment when his emotions had overwhelmed him to the point that all he'd been able to do was cry, sobbing like a child against Shuuichi chest. Their joining had stripped away all of the pretenses he'd held for so long, and Yuki had realized exactly how much pain he'd been in.

He'd tried to keep suppressed, had even kidded himself that he was all right with how things were. But in that moment he hadn't been able to pretend any longer. He liked being alone most of the time, but had hated the complete solitude he'd found himself in. While his brother was good company, there had been no one special in Yuki's life. He hadn't even had a single friend that he could remember from his childhood, and had come to think that he would ever find someone to grow close to. He'd never thought there would be someone in his life that he could make himself vulnerable to, open his mind, soul and body before another's eyes without that person expecting something in return.

He'd carried the weight of his title on his shoulders, trying to deny the fact that it was those duties which made him. Yet he saw it in the eyes of everyone he saw, the jealousy or respect, created only because of the blood he'd been born with. Every expectation weighed like a shackle on him, every person he'd ever known wanting something out of him. Even people he didn't know, the second they heard his name, expected him to act, speak, look a certain way. He HAD to become king, he HAD to do a damned good job of it, he HAD to build up his nation, keep his people happy, be smart and handsome, good with a sword and bow, and be a hundred different men at once before the eyes of everyone around him.

Then Shuuichi had come into his life.

Shuuichi, who saw Yuki only as himself. Who treated him like a friend, a companion. Who held no pretenses with him. Who expected nothing out of him more than he was able to give. Who made him laugh and cry and FEEL for what seemed like the first time in his life.

Who had opened his heart to Yuki, and him lave in that warmth and kindness and love.

It had been mystifying. And terrifying.

Yuki didn't know if he could do it again, if he could open himself up so honestly before Shuuichi like he had. In light of Tetsua's words, he'd thought that sex would of been a message of the love he felt for the youth, but that it would still be a separate act that, in itself, held no real meaning. Even as he'd first started touching the youth, reveling in the pleasure he was giving his lover, he'd thought that he could keep part of himself detached from their lovemaking.

That hadn't been the case at all. Shuuichi had given him his body, his heart, and that could never make it meaningless. As they had reached completion together, all of the barriers that Yuki had built around himself had been shattered, leaving so extremely vulnerable that he'd been terrified.

'I love you.'

And the words had reduced him to a man. Just a man. Not a prince or a future king or a man of noble blood. Not a son, not a brother, not a student or a lead.

Just him.

Just Yuki.

For the first time in his life.

Thankfully, Shuuichi had stopped blushing before he reached the kitchen. The staffers probably would of been too busy to notice, but he still didn't want to have to try and come up with an excuse for his enflamed cheeks.

He'd woken up curled against Yuki's body, the blonde watching him with an unfathomable expression. Shuuichi had tried to cover his embarrassment at being caught in Yuki's bed with him by scrambling to his feet and muttering something he couldn't seem to remember now about soup as he'd escaped as quickly as he could out of the room.

He wondered what Yuki was thinking, having woken up to that. The blonde certainly hadn't looked upset about it, but he hadn't looked that pleased either. In fact, Shuuichi didn't have the slightest idea what Yuki had thought.

How long had Yuki watched him sleep?

That embarrassed him the most. Ryuuichi had often complained about his snoring, had also commented that Shuuichi drooled too. For some reason, the way he slept mattered a lot more when he was actually in the bed with Yuki instead of across the room, and he could just imagine how unattractive he looked.

Although, Yuki had never complained about it. Nor had he said anything that night he'd placed Shuuichi in the bed next to him. Maybe Yuki liked a snoring, drooling, tossing and turning lover laying beside him.

Shuuichi had to laugh at his own thought. Who knew, besides Yuki himself? The fact of the matter was that he'd slept next to Yuki twice now, and there had been no mention of it not happening again.

Composing himself, Shuuichi stepped into the chambers and smiled widely as he presented his tray to the blonde. "I know you might not be hungry, but you should try to eat. It's been almost twenty four hours since your last meal."

Yuki's eyes trailed over his face as Shuuichi took his seat next to the bed. "You left in a hurry," he commented.

So much for composing himself. Shuuichi felt his blush return. "I just thought, I should of been sleeping in my own bed."

Yuki looked away, but Shuuichi could see the trace of a smile on the blonde's lips. "Did I say I minded?"

Shuuichi could only stare at him as Yuki sipped the broth calmly. "Well, you said that day that it wouldn't happen often, so I assumed I shouldn't just try to invite myself. Are you saying now that you want me to sleep with you?" he finally asked.

Yuki didn't meet his eyes. "Have you ever thought that you should take the chance, despite what the consequences might be?"

The brunette tilted his head slightly, a soft smile gracing his lips as he admired Yuki's ability to say so much with just one simple sentence. "So, basically, if I had tried it, I would of known that you wanted me to," he returned.

Yuki didn't reply, and Shuuichi groaned, flopping his face down into Yuki's mattress. "You can be a very frustrating person to know, did you know that?" he muttered, any complaint he might of been making lessened by the fact he was laughing. "Here, I've been forcing myself from being too forward, and now you tell me that I could of just done it." He sat up, pinning Yuki with an exasperated look. "You should say what you want!"

"Fine," Yuki returned calmly. "I want this itching to go away."

Although it hadn't been what he meant, Shuuichi still gave a cheer. "See, that wasn't so difficult, was it? The doctor left some salve for your rash. Now, if you hadn't said anything, you might of had to stay itchy. Because you did, we can get that salve on you as soon as you're finished eating."

Yuki raised an eyebrow at him. "We?" he echoed.

Shuuichi gave him a sheepish look. "I assumed you'd want the help, since the rash is from your feet to your neck. But I don't have to if you don't want me to."

Yuki looked at him for a long moment, a flicker of emotions passing through his eyes before he looked away. If Shuuichi didn't know better, he'd swear he could see a blush working it's way along Yuki's cheeks.

"I want you to," the blond confessed quietly, setting his broth to the side.

Shuuichi had to resist the urge to squeal and jump around. Carefully keeping himself composed, he retrieved the small bottle and settled himself on the bed. "Pull the blanket across you waist," he instructed.

Yuki gave him a confused expression, but did so. He visibly started when Shuuichi reached beneath the blanket and yanked the man's pants down. "What the hell are you doing?" Yuki exclaimed.

Shuuichi gave him a patient look, although he was trying as hard as he could to keep the mischeviousness out of his expression. "It's not going to help your rash if I put the salve on your pants instead of your skin, is it?" he pointed out. Although, now that Yuki was naked save for the slip of fabric over his hips, he had to wonder as to the wiseness of his actions.

Of course, Yuki had said that he needed to take a chance once and a while, and try something on his own. Since hearing the words, his mind hadn't been able to stop making suggestions, each one more daring than the last. Finally, he'd decided to give in to his own desires, and take that chance. If the blonde didn't stop him, Shuuichi had every intention of helping to distract Yuki from his itch in a way that had nothing to do with the salve.

Now he just needed to build up his courage to follow through with his plan.

With the bottle of salve in one hand, Shuuichi began with Yuki's feet. He gently massaged the creme in with his free hand, moving in slow circles over the arch of Yuki's right foot before moving on to his left.

"The doctor ordered that you have bedrest for the next few days, so you're classes and such have been canceled for at least four days. Your father came by while the doctor was examining you. He said if you need any longer than that to just let him know," Shuuichi commented idly as his hands worked their way up to Yuki's legs.

Yuki snorted. "Go figure I almost have to die to be able to get some time off," he retorted.

Shuuichi looked up at him, biting his lip. "I was really scared, Yuki," he confessed. "The doctor said you would be fine, but I didn't believe it for myself until I saw you awake."

Yuki's expression softened, his eyes deeping in color. "I'm fine, now. Just the rash and headache. You don't need to be scared anymore," he said quietly.

Shuuichi trailed his hands up to Yuki's thighs, feeling the muscles tighten under his palms, and he felt a shiver slide down his spine. Yuki might still push him away, but he knew the man was enjoying this. "It made me realize exactly how much you've come to mean to me. The thought of not being with you, it was the worst feeling in the world," he told the other shyly. It was much easier to say in the heat of the moment. He couldn't believe how hard his heart was pounding right now.

He coated his palm once again, letting his hand trail beneath the blanket and over Yuki's right hip, his lips parting when he felt the skin twitch at the contact. "It's not just touching you like this, you know," he went on, slowly inching his hand to the left. "It's being able to be with you. To have your company, whether we're sitting silently or talking about whatever. I know I can annoying sometimes, but it means a lot to me that you listen to me. Even if you tell me to stop right now, even if I have to sleep by myself and never touch you again, it makes me happy to have you nearby, to be able to share even the smallest part of your life."

He stopped the travels of his hand mere centimeters from his target, letting his eyes trail up to meet those of his prince. His breath caught at the raw desire he saw in those ocean colored eyes, feeling an answering heat begin to build inside of him.

"Don't stop," Yuki whispered.

Two words couldn't of meant more.

Again, the next scene has been edited out. ; It's just pointless lemon anyway. 


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

It took only a couple days for Yuki to feel well enough to go back to his usual routine. He had the feeling it had more to do with Shuuichi than anything else. It had been incredibly difficult for the blonde to reveal what he had, but Shuuichi had taken the words to heart. They now shared his bed every night, and any time the desire came over Yuki to kiss the youth, he found the brunette's lips already on their way toward his.

Shuuichi still did have to tend to his daily chores, but it seemed as though every other moment, he would be snuggled up against Yuki as they talked about something, took a meal together, or even just read their separate book.

He could seem to get enough of Shuuichi, although he attempted to keep at least some semblance of propriety and control. It never ceased to awe him as he had the other stretched out below him, Yuki's name on his lips, that a creature this kind and warm would care about him so much. And it made his doubts disappear a little more every time he heard those words on Shuuichi's lips.

'I love you.'

He hadn't been able to gain the courage to reply to them. He heard the words, felt the pulse of his heart as the wave of the other's love washed over him, warming him, comforting him, and somehow easing out all of his tensions all in one moment. Still, part of him was afraid of exactly what it would mean. It would be the last step in their relationship, it would branch that last final gap that remained between them.

Yuki knew full well that his heart was owned by the other, had finally allowed the last of pretenses to be pulled away as he'd held Shuuichi in his arms last night. But admitting that fact out loud was far more difficult that admitting it just to himself.

He heard the door open and pulled himself out of his thoughts, looking up to see Tetsua enter the room. The advisor that was presently speaking, a speech that Yuki hadn't heard one word of, but was forced to stop when the king stood.

"You're all dismissed for now. I sent for Tetsua because I need to speak to my son's in private," the kind announced, not seeming to care that they'd been in the middle of a subject. Of course, Yuki knew it was probably something stupid like a three-piece surplus in the supplies of chicken meat, or someone had stolen a bottle of wine out of the thousands that were in the cellars.

How in the world was Yuki going to be able to go through the rest of his life, listening to all of these petty little details that, really, had nothing to do with running a castle? It was only once or twice a week that they actually discussed anything of importance. No wonder most kings died young. They were bored to death.

"Ah, boys, it's been too long since we talked. How are you doing?" their father asked, once the advisors had finally shuffled out the door.

Yuki raised an eyebrow at his words. He could tell already that this wasn't going to be just a friendly talk between family. His father never tried to soothe them over with idle chatter if he wasn't going to drop some kind of bombshell he knew his sons wouldn't like.

"Fine, just as I assured you this morning," Yuki replied slowly, a little worried. He hadn't the slightest idea what his father would want of them.

"I'm fine too," Tetsua answered. "I having a little trouble with archery, but I'm starting to get the hang of it."

His father waved a hand. "That's good, that's good," he said in a dismissive tone. "I needed to talk to you boys about something important. Tetsua, you know that your birthday is coming up in just a few days."

It wasn't a question, but he still paused.

"Yeah?" Tetsua questioned, looking just as confused as Yuki felt.

"Well, there are going to be many prestigious families there, you know. We even invited those of other countries, that were available, dukes and barons and their families."

Yuki then knew what his father was going to say, and his stomach dropped.

"You know, there are a lot of pretty girls that will be coming. I think it's about time that the two of you started settling down. I'm sure there will be at least two whom would make wonderful wives for you."

Yuki kept his face guarded, stealing a glance at his brother to see that Tetsua, too, held a bland expression. Neither of them spoke immediately.

"I can't believe you'd drop this on me, two days before my birthday," Tetsua finally commented. Yuki could hear the struggle to stay calm in his voice. "Father, you know full well that I'll pick out a wife when I'm ready."

Their father lifted his hands in a defensive position. "I just want you to consider it. Pick out three or four girls to stay behind after the celebration. Get to know them, at least. You're in your twenties now, Tetsua, it's about time you at least started thinking about it."

"And what if I don't want to get married?" Tetsua challenged.

Yuki grimaced. He could already see the out come of this. He wanted to jump to Tetsua's defense, but he honestly didn't know what to say. He didn't want to accidentally give up the fact that his brother had already chosen a life partner.

The king faltered at that, then gave his younger son a stern look. "What are you talking about? Of course you're going to get married!"

"I'm not the one that has to have an heir," Tetsua shot back.

"Perhaps not, but you're still a prince, Tetsua. I've let many things slide with you, but you do still have certain expectations to meet. What will people think, if you turn down every one of these girls?"

"I don't care about what people think. And you know full well that you can't force me to choose one of them!"

"Can't I? If you don't pick some, I will. And I'll arrange for your to meet up with each of them for as long as it takes for you to finally make up your mind."

"I don't want to get married!"

Their father sputtered, and turned his eyes onto Yuki. The blonde grit his teeth, having hoped to stay out of this particular subject. "Will you talk some sense into your brother, Yuki? Tell him that you'll be picking out a wife, just like you're supposed to, and he shouldn't be so stubborn about it!"

Shuuichi's eyes hovered in the front of his mind, shimmering with warmth and kindness and love. If he agreed with his father, the man would fully expect him to go through with it. It was what was proper, what was expected, but Yuki would never be able to face the pain and betrayal he knew he would see in Shuuichi's eyes.

Nor could he face the pain and betrayal he would feel in his own heart.

"I'm not going to pick a wife out either," he stated.

Their father had already turned back to Tetsua, fully expecting him to agree, and Yuki tensed when he saw both turn to stare at him.

"Excuse me?" his father questioned.

"We're not ready for that kind of thing," Yuki bluffed, keeping his face expressionless as he spoke. "Father, you should know you can't force someone to love another. We'll find someone when we're ready."

The kind sputtered, looking from one son to the other before he sighed, his shoulders slumping. "I'm not going to win this argument, am I? Fine, fine. If the two of you want to try and find a pretty girl of the proper rank all on your own, feel free. But the least you can do is at least consider the girls I searched out for you, after all of that work." He continued to complain as he made his way to the door, shaking his head as he muttered something about 'the only sons in the world without hormones', finally stepping out into the hall and leaving the brother's alone.

The moment he was gone, Tetsua rounded on Yuki. "You meant that didn't you? About not picking out a wife. You didn't mean just right now, you meant ever!"

He tried to ignore the grin on his brother's face, glancing away. "I meant what I said," he replied evasively.

Tetsua clamped him on the shoulder, laughing. "Man, it finally happened! I was really scared that you'd be stupid enough to lose the kid! Man, I should of realized when he was wearing those high necked tunics at the hunt! I've never seen him wear them before! You took my advice, didn't you, and had a romantic interlude in the trees! Ah, I knew it! Look at you're face!"

Yuki gave his brother a sharp look, trying to rid himself of the flush working along his cheeks at his brother's ranting. "Father's still right, though, you know. I have to produce an heir sometime. How the hell am I supposed to do that, without hurting Shuuichi?"

Tetsua gave him a tired look. "You're still on about that? I looked into it, you know. You can just appoint someone to take the throne after you, can't you?"

Yuki blinked, stared at Tetsua, then blinked again. "I... Father's always going on about wives and heirs and expectations and propriety... I completely forgot about that."

Tetsua laughed again, apparently thoroughly amused with his brother. He even grabbed his sides and doubled over. "I can't believe you forgot!" he gasped, before keeling over once again.

Yuki flushed, both upset by his brother's outrageous laughing, and his own embarrassment over having forgotten something so important. He couldn't even recall when he'd heard someone tell him that, probably not since the day of his coronation, and the idea hadn't occurred to him since because he just hadn't cared before he met Shuuichi. His father would spin around in his grave like a top, but it still remained a fact that it was fully in Yuki's right to choose someone to take the throne after himself. All he had to do was find a man with a high enough rank that he thought would do a good job.

He didn't have to have a child. He didn't have to find a woman.

He felt numb as he made his way up to his chambers for lunch. The one thing that had spurred all of his doubts and reservations had been completely moot to begin with. He could hardly believe that, after he'd struggled so hard to keep his distance, after all the torturous thoughts and the pain and the uncertainties, none of it really mattered.

The path before him had been suddenly cleared. He could be with Shuuichi, without any consequences other than having someone who really loved him, honestly and openly. He wouldn't be forced to hurt the youth, he didn't have to keep any of his self separated from the other. That dark cloud that had hung over them, kept them from being truly happy with each other, had vanished.

He was free to love the person that he truly loved.

Shuuichi looked up with a wide smile as Yuki entered the room. His heart did a little skip as it always did, and it took all of his control not to run over there and throw himself into Yuki's arms.

Not that it mattered though, because the blonde cut a swift path toward him, scooping a startled Shuuichi into his arms, and kissed him thoroughly before setting him back down again.

The brunette turned shocked eyes up to the other, puzzled at the expression he saw on Yuki's face. "Not that I'm complaining, but what's going on?"

Yuki cupped Shuuichi's cheeks in his hands, pressing their foreheads together.

"I love you."

Of all the times it had been said in these chambers, those words had never passed Yuki's lips before. Shuuichi's heart thudded in his chest and he couldn't help a small gasp as happiness he'd never felt before coursed through him. He hadn't realized until just this moment exactly how badly he'd wanted to hear that.

Still, he couldn't help but disbelieve his ears, his worries stepping into place. "But what about everything else? You know, th-"

"I love you," Yuki interrupted, saying each word firmly, so that there was no way Shuuichi could doubt their meaning.

Again, he didn't know what had changed in his lover. But Yuki loved him, and nothing had ever been so wonderful. Whatever allowed the blonde to dismiss the problems of the future, it had also finally allowed Yuki the freedom to say those words.

And, for once, Shuuichi let himself shut up. Instead, he said all he wanted to say as he pulled Yuki's mouth to his own once again.

The End Hope you enjoyed my ficcie! 


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